Theme Park Apprentice Winter 2017 - Challenge 3

Edited: March 5, 2017, 10:32 AM

Since Jeff is busy all weekend, Jim and I have agreed to post this week's challenge (which Jeff had already completed) to give our competitors more time with it.

Week 3 – Please Don’t Make Me Do This

Pick the absolute worst IP you can think of (that has never been used for a theme park attraction) and build the best land ever for it.

30% of your score will be how absolutely awful the IP you chose is. (10% of your score in the For Fun competition.) If you choose something off the beaten path, you may need to give us some background, because the judges sure aren’t going to take the time to research it themselves.

With your bad IP, choose the best park to place it in, and build a land consisting of: three attractions, a restaurant, gift shop (yes, I said a gift shop for your awful IP…you better make it so good that people will be aching to buy your awful IP’s swag), a “weenie” (something to draw the eye and the visitors back to this section of the park), and a mini parade with at least 5 floats.

For the restaurant and shop, you will need to show what you are selling in general terms and 4-5 specific examples. The land and attractions will need full descriptions along with the connecting tissue that ties everything together.

Remember, terrible IP and awesome land – don’t do terrible IP and ironically terrible land. Barney, for an example that you can’t take because it is currently being used, wouldn’t work as a ride where you see the dinosaur get ripped into tiny pieces. It would also not work as Barney introducing an attraction that is not actually featuring him. The whole land would be about showing how awesomely cool Barney is to the point that you would have a large attendance spike once people realized the awesomeness of what you built. In fact, people would walk into the park saying that there was no way that they would ever be caught dead on a Barney attraction, hear how completely awesome it is while waiting in other lines, experience the awesomeness, and leave the park with a Barney t-shirt and plans to come back to ride the Barney attraction again.

That is what you are trying to do here.

FOR FUN RULES: You don't need to create a parade (though you still can).

Replies (14)

Edited: March 8, 2017, 3:01 PM

I won't have time to develop this further, but I couldn't resist.

That's not a bad IP - This is a bad IP

UNOFFICIAL SUBMISSION

The Outback of Crocodile Dundee

Coming to Warner Bros. Movie World: Hollywood on the Gold Coast.

The Second Biggest film of 1986 is finally coming to a theme park near you. Inspired by the real life adventures of Rod Amsel, and a celebration of Outback Life, this recreation of Walkabout Creek promises to be a true blue delight with theme park audiences.

You'll be able to walk around a real faux Outback town, meeting the strange inhabitants who live here (and they never break character). You'll be able to enter every building as if this is a real town, ensuring that this is a complete immersive experience.

On top of lightning ridge (named for lightning jack, another Paul hogan movie) which overlooks the town you'll see an animatronic aboriginal, swinging the communication device used in the movie - who needs a phone plan when you have one of these.

Attractions:

Mick Dundee's Outback Spectacular.

During this semi-seated, Semi-walk through attraction you'll come face to face with just some of the animals that call Australia home. You'll see a saltwater crocodile perform a "death roll" at feeding time, learn how to find water and food if you find yourself out in the Outback alone, and one lucky guest (or, not quite as lucky guest if they pay an up charge) will learn how to hypnotise a water buffalo.

Camel Train through the Dreamtime

Camels were essential to the opening up of the Outback, and even today Australian camel are prized by middle eastern camel racers. Join your guide as your camel train explores a dreamtime myth , recreated in cave paintings in our faux Outback explaining how the world came to be.

Helicopter Rescue - sponsored by the Australian Flying Doctor Service

Mick's business partner Wally Reilly has gone missing. Race through our faux Outback on this suspended car ride, with the cars themed as helicopters, to locate Wally and relay his location to the Flying Doctor service. $1 from each on ride photo will go towards the vital work they perform.

Boomer's Bounce

A jump and shake spinning ride where the cars are themed as jumping kangaroo, with the riders riding on top.

The Regatta.

Just because the river doesn't flow doesn't mean you can't have a boat race - just get your feet out and leg it! Every day at 2pm a tribute to the Henley-On-Todd regatta will "sail" through the land, including tributes to past winners, as well as classic theme park rides like the river Rapids and swinging pirate ship.

Cecille's

A branch store of the one featured in the classic Australian movie "Dad and Dave come to town" (think what Beverly hillbillies would be like with Australian sheep farmers), Cecilles offers the greatest gifts found anywhere this side of the Great Dividing Range. In addition to typical Australiana fairs you can also find the latest in farming fashions. Yes, you can even get those giant beer cans.

Total Fire Ban

On a high fire risk day a "total fire ban" may be issued, banning any naked flame or barbequeue... but why let that spoil festivities? At Total Fire Ban you'll find the best salads and sandwiches the Country Women's Association have to offer - and it's all you can eat. Try Devilled or scotch eggs, 5 kinds of potato salad, our mighty meaty on white, or make your own fruit salad from the finest Australian produce.

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Edit: Justification. There's nothing that is going to make an Australian cringe more than having to deal with the whole Crocodile Dundee image of Australians... except perhaps those damn awful catch phrases.

March 10, 2017, 2:39 PM

I know I teased a Mars Needs Moms attraction in the TPA Chat Thread but I decided there is much more content in this IP.

From the creative mind of one of the most critically and uncritically acclaimed directors of the decade, coming to Disney’s Hollywood Studios and Walt Disney Studios France, M. Night Shyamalan Land. Everything about this land has come straight from M. Night’s mind.

This will be the first land in a family park exclusively themed to adults, as most of M. Night’s film’s are intense and not child friendly.

The land is themed to M. Night’s home city (and mine), Philadelphia.

Guests enter near the Art Museum facade and proceed down the Franklin Parkway. They can grab a bite to eat at the famous Philadelphia Reading Terminal Market. Famous Philly foods like Soft Pretzels, Roast Pork and Cheesesteaks will be available for purchase. The layout will be like Fast Food Boulevard with different smaller restaurants inside a larger room with area to sit down.

Attraction 1: The Happening Experience
Riders arrive at Philadelphia’s 30th Street Station and are told that they need to leave the city, due to The Happening.
Guests receive a ticket wait in the main hall of the station until their ticket number is called. Then they will wait in line for a platform. The station will have a chaotic feel like in the film.
Then, riders board a simulated SEPTA train, think Hogwarts Express but it doesn’t go anywhere, and attempt to escape the city.
Along the way the plants from the movie attack the train and it looses connection to SEPTA and power.
However while this is Happening, the attack stops, just as abruptly as in the film. The train pulls back into the station and the riders disembark.

Attraction 2: After Earth Coaster
The After Earth Coaster will be a New Gen Vekoma sit-down coaster, much like Lech Coaster at Slaskie Wesole Miasteczko in Poland, however, longer, faster, and more intense. The coaster will boast 4 trains of 24 with an hourly capacity of 1400 riders per hour. It will also have an added midcourse break run and a duel loading station.
Check out this video for an idea of what the coaster might look like.

On the lift hill there will be surrounding screens, think Space Mountain at Disneyland, and synced onboard audio throughout the ride.

Attraction 3: Sixth Sense Trackless Dark Ride
This will be Disney’s first truly scary dark ride and the first modern trackless dark ride at the Walt Disney World Resort.
Riders enter through Cole’s school from the movie and the queue wind through halls with actors playing the ghosts that Cole sees. Then, riders board their vehicles (like the vehicles from Ratatouille: L’Aventure Totalement Toquée de Rémy) and set off into the ride. The ride includes full animatronics and even some scary moments. This ride combines experiences from older Disney dark riders and the newest technology. Riders will be in the first perspective of Cole, like Snow White’s Scary Adventures, as they travel through this 4 minutes experience. Riders will exit into…

Gift Shop: The Sixth Shop
At The Sixth Shop guests will be able to purchase merchandise from all of M. Night’s most popular films.

I know my proposal is shorter this week but the combination of School + Breath of the Wild for the Switch has had be really busy!

Edited: March 10, 2017, 4:27 PM

Coming soon to a Universal Park near you (probably USF), based on the popular 1999-2006 series... The West Wing: The Land. Based on a series almost nobody remembers, except for political junkies, or those who bother to read top 10 lists for the best TV series of all time. It's another personal favorite of mine, but it'd make a horrible theme park land. No action, no adventure, and lots of witty and information packed dialogue that a good chunk of the audience for a Universal park cannot understand! However, I will muddle through it, and attempt to make a great land anyway!

To give a bit of background, I'll default to the description on the show's Wikipedia page "The series is set primarily in the West Wing of the White House, where the Oval Office and offices of presidential senior staff are located, during the fictitious Democratic administration of Josiah Bartlet (played by Martin Sheen)." That's pretty much the easiest way to put it.

Guests will enter the land via a recreation of President's Park, more or less the area near the White House and its surrounding streets. It should be noted that this land is immersive- actors are acting as if they are part of the show. The White House (home to 2 attractions of the land) greets guests as they walk across this nice patch of grass. Around them, are portions on 17th and 15th streets, as well as several buildings. Some of these will house various shops and eateries, as well as a theatre (modeled after the nearby The National Theatre in DC). We'll begin our tour of the land there.

The National Theatre: Home of the various theatricals put on in the land. One of the more interesting to me, and boring to others, shows possible would be debates of actual in-show issues, bills, and events. Since The West Wing has several seasons of events to draw on, it allows for a rich and detailed debate between actors (who would be portraying any of the number of congresspeople/pundits/those in the know, that are referenced in the show, but never seen). While not exactly theme park fair, you could even attempt to see the Reykjavik Symphony Orchestra. (that's a reference to the show, and not actually a good idea). As the debates themselves would change subject from time to time, it's more of a series of rotating attractions then 1 permanent one. As for the theatre itself, a few hundred seats would do. Not like too many people want to see actors portraying fictional senators debate a fictional foreign aid bill in a fictional universe anyway. And yes, I was sarcastic! A sample debate would be Sen. Howard Stackhouse (basically Bernie Sanders) against Sen. Robert Royce (somewhat of an younger Orin Hatch) on healthcare reform. Perhaps even with a bit of Stackhouse's filibuster involved (which in itself was the subject of an entire episode of the series).

The White House: Our main attraction. This is home to 2 attractions, plus a gift shop. Because the actual White House has a gift shop. As for the attractions themselves, they'll be detailed below.

The West Wing Tour: Congratulations! You have been given special access to tour the West Wing! Well, in reality you walked through door #1 and stood in like for a hour, but regardless, you made it in. Now, one of our exciting tour guides/secretaries/speech writers will take you on an exciting tour through places where the real US government will never let you go! See the offices of your favorite West Wing characters! (Or in the cast of Toby, hear his red ball hitting the next office' window) Marvel at the historic busts of Presidents that only exist in this universe! And learn about the rich history of the show's presidents as well. Of course, you can't enter the Oval office, because the last tour group who did happened to be caught in President Bartlet's weekly radio address... They were there for 3 hours. And Donna had to give them key chains from the gift shop. (Also a reference/potential joke on the tour). The big thing for this attraction is how detailed it is. It looks like the set from the show- papers, photograph,s statues and all. While you never see the actual senior staff (to keep bad actors from impersonating much better ones), you hear them, and their presence is felt throughout the tour. Of course, you have interns, staff, and government types running around trying to get things done, which adds to both the humor and interest in the tour. It should never be the same experience twice.

War of the Roses: (I wound have called it Posse Comitatus but it's an noncommunicable name for much of the population). This is the only actual ride, and is based on the closing arc of season 3 of the show. (However, I have taken some liberties on the actual content, for entertainment purposes) Guests who choose door #2, will proceed down a series of hallways that form the line for this attraction. They lead to a secure-looking door, and a actor, who acts as the guard. He points out that past said door is the situation room. Once a group enters the room, the door closes.

2 actors enter- one being the Deputy Deputy Chief of Staff to the President, the other being a member of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. They brief the guests on the mission they are about to take on. Abdul ibn Sharif, Qumari Minister of Defence, and the brother of the Sultan of Qumar, attempted an attack on the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco, which was unsuccessful. The guests must tag along with US Special Forces, and "eliminate" Sharif before he succeeds in an attack. They proceed past the room into a loading area, where the guests load into a series of coaster cars. The "cars" are really part of a USAF flight to intercept Sharif's plane before it heads over international air space. The lift hill is shaky, as any military plane would be, although it is only 50-60 feet. You end the hill by looking out and seeing screens with a clear night sky. Peaceful, right? Wrong! You hear over the car's speakers/radio, the pilots of Sharif's plane saying they've spotted a US military flight. The chase is on! There are several drops, as well as 3 loops. Throughout, you see the plane, via screens, leading you on this chase through the sky over the Mid-Atlantic coast and the Atlantic Ocean. (Sorry if this isn't as detailed as you might expect from a coaster, but I'm not exactly a coaster designer). Zooming across a few more hills, there are several g-intensive spots. Finally, the ride ends when the plane crashes out of the sky onto a runway in Bermuda. Your mission ended, you return to the Situation Room, and exit to the gift shop.

The White House Gift Shop: Here's your swag! Key chains! Books! Pen holders! Replica fighter jets! If it's in a government gift shop, it's here. The key chains are a personal favorite. You can also buy books of the various speeches from West Wing, collected in volumes for your reading pleasure. Yes there are enough to fill several volumes, particularly on subjects like education and warfare. You can also buy an on-ride photo here, with 20% of the money going to the USO (because, why not?). And you can also buy some of Toby's favorite red balls, for your throwing at things. They're red! And perfect for throwing at windows when frustrated! Paul Revere-made knives are not sold here though.

Now, go outside of the White House. A few buildings over is a diner. It's been referenced in several episodes, and in season 1 characters actually ate at it. Now it serves burgers (made with 100% beef), fries (particularly Presidential Garlic fries), and other food items one might find in a fast-casual theme park restaurant. For those late night speech writing sessions with the 2 Laurens, there's also pizza. Cheese usually sells well, although there are various meat toppings for those into that sort of thing. And salads. To quote the series (Season 4, Espiode 21, Life on Mars) "Some of them have cheese. This isn't one of the ones with cheese" Guests can also run into some actors portraying unseen characters from in the series, much like at the theatre/during the walking tour. There may be some interesting things said, if you listen closely enough...

Finally we have the parade! More accurately, it's the Presidential Motorcade, which winds its way down the streets of this land's simulated Washington DC. While not a parade in the traditional sense (as it has no real floats), I personally see it a bit like the old Stars & Motor Cars parade at DHS. Security vehicles, black limos, and motorcycles, are just some of the things you can see. And of course, the Presidential limo. Picture pretty much any time a President goes out, and you get this parade. Accept without all that horrendous traffic, or Secret Service welling all the manholes shut and removing all the mailboxes from the street. You might even see some protestors!

To close (as this is edging at over 1,600 words), The West Wing is a terrible idea for a theme park land. But there's a theatre, immersive actors, and a walk through of the West Wing. There's also a coaster where you battle a terrorist. And a restaurant that serves good American food. Finally, we have a motorcade for a parade. And that's really about it.

Edited: March 10, 2017, 6:36 PM

If you asked any film geek what was the worst movie ever made, they’d probably say United Passions. United Passions is a soccer themed movie, 99% funded by FIFA that premiered just days after the FIFA corruption scandal broke. On its USA opening weekend, grossed an astounding… $318!!!! It is known for it’s poor script, and obvious bias towards FIFA support and has scored a 1/100 on several leading movie review sites. Die Welt, the director quotes, “I did it for the money.” But now, FIFA has me to create a soccer themed land for them based around United Passions, and I present…
FIFA’s Soccer World
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Entrance:
You enter the land passing right by a huge 22ft soccer ball placed to your left. This is the icon of the land and it can be seen through most of the park. Placed in front of this soccer ball, we have some trees, grass, and nice looking benches each with the name of a country that’s hosted the World Cup carved into them. This is a nice photo spot and a good “central draw” for the land.
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Dining:
When you enter the park, immediately to your left is our “food court” area for FIFA’s Soccer World. Here, we have small permanent food stands from each country that’s hosted the World Cup. You can get French Baguettes, Korean Barbeque, Fresh German Pretzels, and Italian Pasta all here!!!! Think of this area as like a permanent Festival of Holidays that’s really built out and looks quite nice. It is in a circular shape with tables and grass in the center so you can enjoy a nice place to eat.
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Rides:
-GOAL!!!!!! This is an outdoor Gyro sphere ride that features fun and interactive elements!!!

Entrance:
The entrance looks like the entrance of the fictional ILTPA Stadium!!!! Aka, the I Love Theme Park Apprentice Stadium. It is very large combined with the speakers which play various stadium noises such as crowds cheering and such. This is really to make you feel like you’re going to the year’s big game!!!!

Queue 1:
You enter what would be the lobby of the stadium, and this room is HUGE. This queue is heavily themed and indoors, which makes this line very welcoming during the hot summer months. You go through the various switchbacks, while on various sides there are “vendor stands” where, by projected on screens, it looks like people are actually making food. There are also TVs playing shows about soccer, and posters of famous players with facts. Along with the added in sounds, it really does feel like you’re in the middle of the stadium lobby.

Queue 2:
After exiting the switchbacks, you enter what appears to be the news broadcasting room. There is a desk with papers, light and sound rigs, and a giant camera pointed towards the middle of the line. This camera films and livestreams onto a TV right next to itself, so you can see yourself on the TV showing a breaking news report that the players are about to enter the field. This queue is 3 short switchbacks.

Final Queue/Preshow:
A grouper at the end of Queue 2 counts the line into 2 sections of 20 groups, at this point, each section goes into it’s own identical preshow room. You enter and it looks like Team USA’s locker room. There is theming all around, but some barriers to keep people from damaging anything. An employee dressed as a ref starts the preshow showing on the TVs above. After the preshow explains how to get into the car, shut and buckle your OSTR, and how to pick your intensity level on the small screen attached to the OSTR, the employee gets everyone hyped up and then lets them into the final waiting section. The preshow also explains how to pick your intensity level, kind of like how Knight’s Tournament at Legoland works.

Final Waiting Section:
Each section moves into their own little “pen” that keeps them separated where they are about to be released to go to the loading platforms, and board the ride.
Attraction Set Up:
There are 2 large “soccer fields” that each have 20 soccer balls (Gyro spheres) on them each. The ground that they run on is painted green to look like grass, and there are goals on each side of the net. There are also bleachers set up on one side of each field so people can watch.

Loading/Unloading:
To load and unload, the soccer balls move up into the loading/unloading platforms. The OSTRs and the front of the soccer ball opens and the old group gets out and clears the platform. At this point, the new group of has walked to the platform, and once all the old guests have exited the cars and platform, the gates open and the new groups of 2 can get in the car. They hop in, and pull down the OSTRs, and on the phone sized screen in front of them, they pick 1 of 5 intensity levels ranging from very mild to very intense. This screen also contains a camera on top so employees can see inside the car at all times. One of the 5 employees check their restraints, and once everyone’s restraint has been checked, an employee at the control panel electronically shuts the door on the soccer ball and the ride starts. Please note, there are doors on the front of each car so people can get in and out of the vehicle, imagine this being like how to shut and open an actual hamster ball. On the inside of the ball, there is a “wrap” facing outwards, so that way people looking in can see a soccer ball exterior, but the people inside the car looking out can see clearly.

Ride:
The ride cycle is 90 seconds. Your car pulls away from the loading platform directly next to one side of the “field,” and then the fun begins!! During this time, your ball moves around the field, some flipping insanely, some gently rocking, depending on your intensity. The soccer ball is programed to get within a couple inches of other soccer balls, then move away in the opposite direction, making it seem like you bumped the other soccer ball. This fun-ness goes on for 90 seconds and then the cars move back into the platform. The old group then exits the platform, and then to the left and out back into the land!!

Capacity:
If every car is full, and every dispatch is exactly 90 seconds, (40 people per ride x 20 rides per hour) x 2 fields = 1600pph.
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FIFA’s Soccer Spin

This is a Tilt a Whirl ride located across from GOAL!!!! on the upper right hand of this land, while GOAL!!!! is on the upper left hand.

Entrance/Queue:
You enter the queue through a large soccer ball that has a very Simpsons Ride esque sign on top of it that reads in big letters: FIFA’s Soccer Spin!!! Those black and white letters with the flashing lights really attract guests to the ride, especially at night. The queue is simple switchbacks that have lots of shade and TVs showing various soccer TV shows. As you wind through the queue, you’ll see many boards with cool facts about FIFA and Soccer players. The queue is semi-large and could probably hold a 40 minute line or so. This is definitely the least fancy/theme queues in the land, but it still gets the job done.

Ride:
The Tilt a Whirl model has 7 cars that hold 2-3 people each. A grouper will count off 7 groups, and then you run up the 4-5 stairs and are on the platform!! The cars look like soccer balls, and the tarp that covers the ride mechanics is decorated to look like a soccer field. One of the 2 operators comes and checks your lapbar restraint, and then the ride gets started. The ride runs a very fun 90 second cycle (much longer than most) and even switches direction during the ride. Once the ride is over, the riders exit the car down the ramp next to the queue, and are spilled back into Soccer World.
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Flight of the World Cup:
-This is a Flying Theater style attraction like The Jimmy Fallon ride (at USF) located in the lower left corner of the land across from the vGiant Soccer Ball and the “Food Court”

Entrance: There is a giant sign that says Flight of the World Cup right next to the entrance, and next to that there is a giant globe that has been cut out so you can walk through it. There are trees and colorful flowers all around the entrance, and it is very visually appealing. There is a sign warning that there is some motion and people who cannot handle similar experiences are advised not to ride.

Queue 1:
You enter through the Globe and into an outdoor and shaded switchbacks area that is lightly themed. 72 people can be in the preshow room at one time, so a grouper lets parties in until they would exceed 72 people with the next party. If you’re waiting to go in, you wait in this queue

Preshow intro to queue:
This is a really interesting concept that could turn out amazingly if done right. You are entered into a preshow room that is themed to a Helicopter Hanger where helicopter pilot Steven Cabalas arrives on the TV screen. He thanks you for joining him on his tour of all the places the World Cup has been held, and tells you that helicopter is still getting fueled. He says that he does have a small surprise for us though, he brought a couple people who lived in the places we’re going to come and teach us about their country! He also reminds us again that this is a motion simulator, and people who cannot handle simulated motion experiences are advised not to ride. This preshow is roughly 1 minute. You then go to Queue 2

Queue 2:
EVERY PERSON IN THE PRESHOW AT THIS MOMENT GETS THEIR OWN, INDIVIDUAL COLOR CARD. AND EVERYONE IN THE PRESHOW AT THAT MOMENT GETS THE SAME COLOR (sorry, but these are super important.) Every person is told to hold tightly onto that card, as that’s how you get on the ride. This room is large and decorated to look like an airport glider. On the sides of the room, there are various booths for each of the countries that we’re going to be visiting. Each one of them is staffed by one or two cultural representatives which are there to talk with you about their culture and the place they used to live!!! There are 14 booths for each of the countries we’ll visit: Mexico, Germany, Russia, Japan, England, Argentina, Spain, Brazil, Russia, France, South Africa, Italy, and Switzerland, and Chile. You can buy a “passport” for $1 from “Customer Service”, and whenever you go to one of the booths and learn something, you can get a stamp. This entertains the kids as it becomes something like a scavenger hunt!!! You can learn some interesting things from all of these people and it would be super fun!!!! There is also a play structure, TVs, and some couches to make sure everyone has something to do. Also, restrooms and wall mounted touch screen games are available to ensure that there is enough for kids to keep entertained in what could be an hour line. When the lights turn the color of that person’s card, they get to go to the next room. This system is exactly like what is on The Jimmy Fallon ride at USF

Queue 2:
This room looks also like an airplane hangar, and as the people enter the room, they drop off their card and get in a traditional line. There are several small airplanes in this artificial hangar and a lot of theming in the room. When it is time, the people in that traditional queue will be sent to preboarding. There are 72 seats per theater, everyone rides with the people from their preshow, as you remember that at that time they all got the same colored car. There are 2 theaters so the group is either lead to the left or right.

Preboarding:
Steven then comes on and says our helicopter is waiting, but he made a short video we need to see before we can get on. This safety spiral shows us how to buckle our safety belt, and also reminds us of the fact that this is a motion simulator, and while it doesn’t have very intense motion, people with any prone to motion sickness or fear of simulated heights shouldn’t ride. This room looks kinda rundown and is mainly filled with dim lighting, metal, and boxes. Suddenly, the dim lights become a bright and light orange and Steven says that that’s our go ahead to ride! The doors open and you head into the theater.

Restraint Check/Ride Start:
You enter the rows of “helicopter” seats, and have a seat, buckling your safety belt. Once one of the 6 seatbelt checkers, as there’s 6 rows of 12 people, checks your belt, the ride is cleared and it starts moving.

Ride:
We fly out of the hangar and into the clouds. Once emerging, we coast past Mexico, Germany, Russia, Japan, England, Argentina, Spain, Russia, France, South Africa, Italy, and Switzerland, and Chile. The Ride ends with our helicopter flying over the closing ceremony of the 2014 World Cup in Brazil before gliding into the sky where the lights and sound slowly fade as the ride ends. The lights then come on and Steven thanks us for joining him on his tour and wishes you a great rest of your day as you exit!!

Ride Details:
There are roughly 15 seconds of film for each location, and you don't fly over the World Cup as it's happening, but over famous landmarks. Like the Leaning Tower of Pisa for Italy, and Mayan Ruins for Mexico. The scene changes are very similar to the old Soarin over California where there aren’t transitions, they just quickly switch. For the most part, this ride’s movement is gentle and minimal, but for example, in the Argentina scene, the plane has a couple bumps and jolts, almost like turbulence. Steven will then come on over the speakers and say that we’re just hitting some routine turbulence and there’s no problem. Think of it like 85% Soarin over California, and 15% of a watered down version of Minion Mayhem.

Exiting:
After you exit the theater, you walk down the airport exit walkway. It is filled with signs welcoming you back in all the different languages spoken at the countries we visited. You then exit out back into Soccer World where you think about how cool it was to see all the countries where the World Cup has happened, and how you can’t wait to go buy some merch.
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Retail:
-Soccer Central. This is a large retail store located in the center of FIFA’s Soccer World. It sports a very festive lime green and light yellow color scheme and looks very modern. Inside, there is an ample amount of space to buy the jerseys of popular players, soccer balls, and other soccer related merchandise. The store hosts 4 cashiers booths to help assist guests quickly, and has lots of air conditioning for those hot summer days.
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To finish:
This is an incredible Soccer and FIFA themed land, that features unique dining, Awesome Soccer Merch, and 3 Amazing Attractions. 1 of which has an absolutely mind blowing queue, and the other featuring not only that, but also a first of its kind ride system. This will surely be an extremely memorable land that will have the entire family talking all the way home!!! Hope you enjoyed!!!!

Edited: March 11, 2017, 3:16 PM

"A disaster zone of Chernobyl-esque proportions."

"Stay home. Paint something. Watch it dry. It'll be more rewarding."

"'Wild Wild West’ was less painful."

These are just a handful of excerpts from the scathing reviews of M. Night Shyamalan's 2013 film After Earth. Oh, and that last one? Those are the words of one of the stars of the film itself, Will Smith. After Earth managed just 11% positive reviews (21 out of 191) on movie review aggregate website Rotten Tomatoes. It was the recipient of three Golden Raspberry awards, which "honor" the worst films of the year, and was nominated for three more, including Worst Picture. The beatdown doesn't stop there: the film made just half of its $130 million budget back in the U.S. and, while grossing $243 million worldwide, is considered a major box office disappointment. It's safe to say this is not a glowing entry in the director's filmography.

To summarize the basic premise of After Earth for those who are fortunate enough to not have seen it: After Earth takes place one thousand years from now, following an environmental fallout that causes humanity to relocate from Earth to the planet of Nova Prime. While on his final voyage before retirement, Ranger Corps general Cypher Raige and his son Kitai crash land on Earth due to an asteroid shower. Cypher, injured in the crash, tasks his son with retrieving a beacon that serves as their only chance of survival and escape from Earth, all while avoiding the many dangers that have inhabited Earth after humanity's exodus. In typical Shyamalan fashion, it's a very human story hidden under high concept, fantastical ideas... and it's not particularly good.

But now, Shyamalan's critically and commercially lombasted failure is coming to Universal Orlando Resort. Welcome to the world of After Earth.

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Upon entrance to the land, guests are immediately greeted by the temperate setting from the film, particularly one of the more wooded areas full of highly evolved flora and fauna and various sources of flowing water. In keeping with the setting the film portrays, the land would undergo "thermal shifts" at various points throughout the day: at these points, special effects would cause the plants to appear snow-covered, and hidden fans would turn on to simulate a cold environment, as well as cool off guests during the particularly hot months (this could easily be turned off in the cooler months). At the center of the land is a 1:1 scale animatronic of an Ursa, one of the main vicious antagonistic species from the film, for guests to pose for pictures with... should they not fear it and alert it of their presence.

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The land's main attraction is After Earth: The Ride, a motion simulator ride a la Star Tours based somewhat on the film's plot. Guests are given a rundown of their mission while waiting in the queue: as part of their official Ranger Corps training, they are invited on a voyage to test a brand new spaceship model. They then board their ship, which seats 30 guests, and the ride begins.

The ship departs from the Nova Prime starport and up into the atmosphere of the planet, eventually into the star system beyond the planet. The voyage is interrupted by an unprecedented event in Ranger Corps history: a face-to-face meeting with the mysterious Skrell spacecrafts (Skrell are essentially the main enemies of the Rangers). The ship engages in a rough battle, and finds that the only way to escape safely is through black hole travel. This is a success in escaping the Skrell, but the ship is heavily damaged, and the navigation system is down entirely. Guests hurtle towards Earth as the ship's captain (present via offscreen voiceover) struggles to fix the navigation system. They breach the atmosphere, and descend lower and lower, faster and faster. Just as all hope seems to be lost, and they look to crash land just like in the film, the captain gets the system back online... but not before taking a nice little beating on the surface of Earth's ocean. The ship takes a winding maneuver through a mountain range (passing by the volcano from the film) until it reaches a clearing where it can begin its ascent back to space. Upon reaching space, the ship travels via black hole one last time, and returns to Nova Prime. Guests depart into the gift shop as the captain admits that the ship should probably undergo a few more voyages to iron out those bugs...

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For guests who want a ride that's not quite as strenuous, they can take the After Earth River Adventure, where they board round rafts built for 12 to traverse a river just like Kitai did in the film. The ride starts out simple enough, giving guests a chance to observe the enviroment while sailing along the river's current, but it doesn't take long for things to go awry. Guests are soaked as they pass under waterfalls and an ever increasing current. At one point, the raft would pass by a massive bird's nest inhabited by an animatronic eagle; at another, the ride's big climax, the ride would take guests into an "underground" section that would simulate a cave, in which riders come face to face with a large tiger animatronic before a final drop to surprise guests.

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Guests can fully immerse themselves in the world of After Earth at the Ranger Academy, a live action show with interactive elements. A select number of guests that have signed up for the show's various times are brought onto stage in front of the live audience to learn the art of "ghosting" (for the uninitiated, this is the process of supressing fears used to efficiently battle the Ursas). Each participating guest is provided a cutlass, and is taught different attacks by the show's host. Once the guests feel they have a handle on using their cutlasses, a live Ursa contained within a pod to prevent any escape. This would be a dynamic animatronic that would react based on the reactions of the participants themselves: the Ursa would move and scream if the participants seem fearful, but calm down if the guests properly "ghost" themselves. Once every participant has their turn, the host thanks them for their service and rewards each participant with an official Ranger Corps badge.

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At the Ranger Corps Outpost, built into what appears to be a crashed spaceship at the exit of After Earth: The Ride, guests can pick up various After Earth themed merchandise that no Nova Prime Ranger would be caught without. Among the merchandise available for includes, but is not limited to: prop replica cutlasses (the primary weapon of the United Ranger Corps) with retractable blades a la toy lightsabers for Star Wars; official United Ranger Corps T-shirts, hoodies, etc.; action figures and models based on the characters and spaceships from the film; and a multitude of tie-in books for those looking to expand their knowledge of the lore of the After Earth universe.

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Guests can stop and grab a bite to eat at Raige's, a sci-fi quick service restaurant themed like the elegant living structures of Nova Prime. The restaurant serves typical amusement park style dishes: cheeseburgers, chicken tenders/nuggets, salads, and various sandwiches, each with a choice of side (fries, chips, green beans, etc.) and a drink (soft drinks, bottled water, etc). All of these meals would be available as standard sizes or Cadet kids meals. Guests may choose to sit inside with simulated views of the Nova Prime landscape, or outside in the lush environment of Earth.

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Once a day, guests can watch the Nova Prime Parade, a mini-parade that makes its way through the land. The first float is based solely on Ranger Cadets, where ground level actors entertain guests with acrobatics while those on the float partake in various Nova Prime salutes and cutlass maneuvers. The second is based on wildlife from the attractions and the film (tigers, eagles, monkeys), portrayed via intricate puppets. The third showcases spaceships, such as the very stingray-esque design, engaged in an asteroid belt. The fourth is themed around the volcano finale from the film, and has a live actor simulating a battle with an Ursa. And lastly, the final float is dedicated to the heroes of the film, Kitai and Cypher (obviously not played by Jaden and Will Smith, but by similar looking actors).

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After Earth may have been a misguided effort by M. Night Shyamalan in the eyes of moviegoers, but Universal is proud to form a working relationship with him not only with his latest batch of (much more well-received) films, including The Visit and Split, but also in bringing one of his works to life in a theme park setting, perhaps shedding a new light on a film with lots of potential.

March 11, 2017, 6:31 PM

Meet the Robinsons is a 2007 movie from Disney Animation.  This movie highlights the importance of finding our family, following our dreams, and taking chances; sometimes second chances. The film follows the story of an orphan as he goes to the future with his son-to-be.  The movie features quirky gags inside an idealistic future that makes the perfect setting for a theme park land.

Tomorrow Town is located in Disney’s Euro Disney.  It takes a look at a possible future. Tomorrow Town is located behind Toy Story Playland.

Upon entering Tomorrow Town, guests are immediately immersed in the whimsical atmosphere of the future. This future is meant to be a bright and utopian version of a city, different from the space-travel based “Tomorrowland”.

Guests that have just entered find themselves on a Robinson Lane leading to a plaza. The entry street is street is home to Mike Yagoobian’s Hats and More, Tomorrow Town’s main retail location; as well as Hat Attack, a journey into a dystopian future. It is also home to Tomorrow Town’s major dining location, Todayland Grille, as well as houses that are not open to guests.
This street’s architecture features tall skyscrapers, using forced perspective to make them appear taller. These buildings often feature curved edges and a mix of building materials (i.e.: Glass walls with brick corners, etc.). Despite its futuristic appearance, sidewalks are lined with trees of various shapes and sizes, including unusual and silly topiaries. This architecture keeps the youthful, innovative atmosphere alive. At night, the buildings light up with bright neon lights of all different colors, including projected colors on buildings. The music throughout this street and the rest of the area are instrumental variations on “Another Believer” from the soundtrack of the film. Each verse uses different instrumentation, changing the style of music the same melody is played in.

The plaza up ahead is circular, with another path leading out of the left. As guests enter from Robinson Lane, the Robinson Industries building is directly in front of them. This building is home to The Time Machine, a roller-coaster ride taking guests throughout the new future. The Robinson Industries building is the only building in this plaza. The street circles around the center, that seems surrounded by trees  in rectangular holders. These trees’ leaves have been cut into a spherical shape. THe ground of this plaza is designed to have rings of different colors emulating from the center, with tiles placed and labeled with inventions as though it were a timeline.

The path to the left begins with a bridge over a river, and guests find themselves at an intersection. The bridge is raised by posts rising out of the river, and is painted white. On this path, guests can find versions of both time machines, one and two. These time machines are open for photo-ops with guests.

If guests go right at the intersection, they arrive at the Robinson estate. Here, guests with little ones can find Lewis’s Garden, a play area designed for young children. Lewis’s Garden features the “Jumping Fountains” that can be found outside “Journey into Imagination” in EPCOT, spouting from the ground. The Robinson House is also home to Meet the Robinsons, a trackless ride taking guests to, well, meet the Robinsons.

Guests throughout Tomorrow Town can find a number of references to the film. For example, guests can find the movie advertisement “Invasion of the Brain Scanners” painted on one of the walls of Mike Yagoobian’s Hats and More; extremely perceptive guests may notice a poster of Nikola Tesla in a window that is identical to that in Lewis’s room.  One can even find a poster advertising “Visit North Montana!” (It hasn’t been called canada in years…). Also, guests can find several Disney quotes about moving to the future.

Guests who go straight at this intersection find themselves back in Toy Story Playland. Guests at either exit find a sign with the Walt DIsney Quote that includes the film’s motto, “Keep Moving Forward”.

Attractions

The Time Machine.

The Time Machine is an exciting new roller-coaster ride in Tomorrow Town. This ride goes both inside and outside, and combines both thrill and storytelling elements. Time Machine has 3 inversions and a 48” height requirement.


Facade and Queue

The Time Machine is located in the Robinson Laboratories building. Guests enter through a set of large glass double doors that have been propped open. Above these doors, a banner that reads “Keep Moving Forward” can be found.

The first room that guests walk through is filled with large inventions of all types. There appears to be broken cars (mostly with wings) in one area, as well as other large inventions. Each invention’s area has a desk next to it, with papers and drawings strewn about. If guests look carefully, they can find blueprints for the original “Dreamobile” from Journey into Imagination as well as the last hand of Baymax from Big Hero Six.

In the next area, guests find themselves in a very open, large room. The line is designed to weave around display cases. Inside these display cases, are various models of Time Machine prototypes, along with notes written by Cornelius Robinson of why they failed. Some of these notes include comical retellings of accidents.

Guests then find themselves in a long hallway. Screens above the guests show footage of Michael Yagoobian as an adult breaking into the Robinson home. We then see the “Second Time Machine” rising from behind the house and flying away. Next, guests see an AA Wilbur Robinson telling guests that they must go back in time to retrieve Lewis, to protect his science fair project.

In the loading dock, guests board the ride trains. The vehicles themselves appear to be “steampunk” trains. There are two loading bays,one on the left and one on the right.  The tracks begin parallel to each other, but then become later.

The Ride

Part I

As guests board the trains, they are instructed by Wilbur’s voice to pull down their shoulder restraints. As they do, sliding doors close on each side of the train to further secure guests in the ride vehicle.

The guests pull away from the loading station, and take a left turn. The ride begins to accelerate as they pass through a brightly lit tunnel with flashing neon lights. At the end of this tunnel, the guests’ speed declines rapidly to a stop.

In this scene, guests find a science fair in the gym. An AA Wilbur whispers something to to an AA Lewis. After this, smoke rises from a model volcano, thus setting off fire alarms; as well as several projects going wrong. Lewis’s “Memory Scanner” begins to fall apart, as pieces begin to fly about. Guests’ trains exit through the gym doors, just as they see an adult Michael Yagoobian sneak into a hiding place.

The next scene takes place on the roof of a tall building. Wilbur reveals the Time Machine to Lewis, and they board. WIlbur waves toward the guests, as if summoning them to go with him. The trains launch start, enter through an identical tunnel as before, and exit to outside. As of this point, the two track are symmetrical, not parallel.

Part II

Once outside, The Time Machine can be seen from almost anywhere in Tomorrow Town. Guests first find themselves in a twist, and then down next to the overflow queue outside. The ride lifts up, and rolls around the other train. The tracks separate, and take a sharp dive downward at 95 degrees.

This dive takes guests down into an underground tunnel, which they begin to rise from again. Guests spiral up and down the tallest skyscraper in the Tomorrow Town , which has glass walls. Guests can see their own reflections on these walls, until they turn away.

Guests take a series of sharp turns, weaving in and around the other train. Trains roll around each other, and then separate as they slow down to their respective loading stations, where the guests unload.


Overall, The Time Machine is a great E-Ticket addition to Tomorrow Town.


Hat Attack

Hat Attack is a dark ride in Tomorrow Town. The ride uses three-dimensional screen technology to fully immerse the guests in this ride experience.  The ride vehicles are fixed to a track, though they can rotate on the yaw axis a full 360 degrees, and can rock slightly forward, back, left, and right.

Facade and Queue

The show building for this attraction certainly stands apart from the other buildings in Tomorrow Town. While the other building appear to be part of a utopian, whimsical future, the show building for Hat Attack appears to be part of a dark, industrialized future. It also resembles Dorris the Bowler Hat, and is completely soot-colored.

Guests enter the building through a pair of dark metal doors, that are permanently held open. Inside, guests find that an overflow room to the right, which appears to be a large, open, grey room with many furnaces (not real fire, of course). The overhead tubing and wiring signifies that guests are in some kind of industrial setting.

After this room, guests enter a long hallway, well-lit, but with glass on each side. Behind the glass, guests can see the assembly of robotic bowler hats, through various machinery and slightly ridiculous contraptions. This is the hat factory, where the evil hats are built at an alarmingly high rate.  

As guests move down the hallway, it is at the end of this hallway, guests are in another large, open room. This also serves as the loading room. On the walls, guests can find signs displaying warning signs about the hats themselves, with sayings such as “Danger! Hats may be hostile!” The ride vehicles resemble the “Original Time Machine” from the film. When guests reach the loading dock, guests are separated into four rows of four, and as metal gates swing open, they board their time machines.

The Ride

Guests enter the ride and first see Mike Yagoobian (also known as the Bowler Hat Guy) signing a contract to mass produce the evil hats.  The scene is very similar to that in the movie, and guests are watching the scene. They are not truly involved with the story yet.  They are getting the information they will need to understand the rest of the story.

The ride moves onto the streets.  These are not the streets guests were on outside the ride.  This is an alternate version of reality.  It is a dystopia where the hats are running wild.  They are flying everywhere.  There are fires and smoke and everything is gray.  It is the opposite of the land outside the ride.  

Everywhere, people are being attacked by the bowler hats.  The hats have the ability to control minds, and as they start to attach to people, the people begin to chase your time machine.  The speed of the ride increases, taking sharp turns through the streets of the Californian city to avoid the hats and the zombie-like people who are wearing them.  

As they speed through the city, they find themselves surrounded by hats, they are chased into the old Robinson house, now topped with a gigantic bowler hat.  As they enter the garage, the Robinson family appears.  They are all being controlled by the hats.  “This can’t be happening” Lewis’s voice says.  

“Oh , Lewis,” one of them says, “it already has.”  The guests speed out of the building.

Suddenly, the music becomes ominous. The huge bowler hat on top of the building lights up.  It rises off its foundation and flies towards the guests.  They begin to fly away, but the hat is quickly closing on them.  They fly above the industrialized dystopia as they try to escape, but the hat is too fast for them.  

The chase ensues as the hat follows the guests.  Just as the hat is closing in on the guests, a swirly purple and blue hole opens in front of the guests.  As guests speed through it, they find themselves outside the Robinson house as it appeared in the idealistic future.  They have gone back in time to a slightly earlier future; before everything turned dark.  

They speed away from the house and towards the Inventco building.  As they fly in through the window, they see Yagoobian signing off on the hats.  “The hat is using you, Goob,” Lewis says.  “As soon as she gets what she wants she’ll get rid of you.”    

Yagoobian drops his pen, the contract only half signed.  Guests blast into the future, as Lewis tells them.  At first, it appears to be the same dark future.  However, it begins to revert back to the original, pretty future.  As it reverts, the happy music from the movie score plays.  

“You’ve saved the future!”  Lewis says.  “Great job everyone!!”  The ride ends as guests disembark from the same place where the ride began.  

Meet the Robinsons

Meet the Robinsons is a new trackless ride coming to Tomorrow Town.  This ride takes guests on a whimsical tour of the Robinson household, meeting each of the different family members. This ride has no height requirement, and uses AA’s to portray characters.

Facade and Queue

The queue begins at a pair of symmetrical “R”’s made of hedges outside the Robinson household. The queue takes quests around and through the garden, eventually leading them back to the front door of the Robinson House. Guests here find a pair of twins in two different large plant holders on each side of the door(These characters are “Spike” and “Dimitri). Their heads pop up occasionally, and they tell guests to “ring their doorbell”.

Guests enter, and find themselves in the main entrance foyer. This room is lightly painted in yellow and orange. Guests are also exiting the attraction through this area, and out a different door. Guests pass through this room for only a moment before turning right and into the loading bay.

The loading bay resembles the garage from the film. Guests here find an AA Carl the robot instructing guests on how to load their vehicles. In between spiels, he often jokes with the guests, using a tone similar to that of a game show host.

The Ride

Guests board their vehicles and (assuming they follow Carl’s instructions) pull down their lap bar. The vehicles use one lap bar to secure all of the guests, and once they have been checked, the vehicles begin to move forward.

In the first scene, guests seem to be in the same entry hall they entered the building through. The only difference is that now a large train and cannon are placed at the wall of the room the guests have entered through. Beside the train sits Billie Robinson, a young woman in a blue dress; beside the cannon stands Uncle Gaston, who seems to be dressed as a bullet. Gaston asks the guests to “Time the race”, and he climbs into the cannon. Guests hear a loud “BANG”, and the train begins moving, as do the guests’ vehicles into the next scenes.

Next, guests find themselves in the living room, with a long hallway replacing the right wall. In the living room, guests find Joe Robinson. He is severely overweight, and does not stand up out of his chair. He merely waves at the guests. Just after this, Lazlo flies across the room in a white wetsuit, painting a line across the wall. (Instead of real paint, projectors will create the illusion of paint, but only temporarily so the wall is fresh and ready for the next guests.)

Guests begin to move down the hallway, and as they do, doors begin to open. Behind the first door on the left, guests find Granny Krunklehorn dancing to very bad disco music. The next door opens to reveal Fritz and Petunia. Petunia is actually a puppet on Fritz’s hand, to give the illusion of Petunia’s voice, Fritz speaks in his falsetto. The third door opens, and guests find Lefty the giant purple squid reaching out to greet them. Guests continue to the end of the hallway, and exit out a door to the right.

In this third scene, guests appear to be back in the garden. However, guests are not actually outside, as guests would not want to be rained on during the ride, nor would they want the attraction to shut down every time it rained.  Outside, guests find Unce Art boarding a large flying saucer, wearing what seems to be a superhero costume. This saucer lifts up off the ground, and begins to fly around. A turret appears from the bottom, and shoots a large yellow glob of what appears to be cheese at the ground. Out of this glob, crawls Tallulah Robinson, who seems to be wearing a kind of cutout of a skyscraper on her head. A pair of double doors open, and guests re-enter the house.

This scene appears to be painted entirely in a silver color. Franny Robinson appears to be conducting a jazz band, with one noticeable abnormality. All of the musicians are frogs. As the frogs wrap up their number, the guests move back into the garage and unload where the guests boarded; guests exit through the version of the foyer used for the queue.

Meet the Robinsons will be a lighthearted whimsical attraction that truly creates liveliness and pure fun to Tomorrow Town.

Celebrate the Future

Celebrate the Future is a mini-parade running in Tomorrow Town. Disney has had a long tradition of celebrating the future. In fact, the same name was used in a song to celebrate the millennium. Therefore, it is only fitting to continue to honor this theme with the parade in this land.

This parade features five floats to represent the film. Each float is brightly colored and resembles a character, or object in the film Meet the Robinsons. Guests can find this parade throughout Tomorrow Town.

The parade begins with the “Robinson Industries” float. The base of this float is composed of large contraptions. Most of these contraptions have small moving pieces, such as dials spinning or fans turning. On top of these contraptions is a model of the Robinson Industries building. This model stands about 20 feet tall, and rotates. This float serves as an introduction to the rest of the parade.

The music for this parade consists of variations on the Disney classic “Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow”. The variations will change for each float, to match the atmosphere of the floats.

The next float resembles a giant bowler hat that has one almost spyglass-like eye that glows red, with metal, spider-like legs. This float is quite similar to the Maleficent float in Walt Disney World’s Magic Kingdom, in that guests can see large gears inside it that, in theory, are powering the float. The hat itself can turn to look at guests, though the legs do not divert from the parade route.

This float is followed by three smaller copies of the previous float. However, these floats are roughly 6 feet tall, and move at much faster speeds. These floats can also turn side-to-side, meaning they can get much closer to interacting with the guests.


The third major float in this parade resembles a large train engine. However, this train resembles a monorail more than an actual train. It is bright yellow, with long blue stripes down the side. Along the sides of this float nearer the ground, guests can find actors portraying many of the Robinson family.

The fourth float in Celebrate the Future resembles a large T-Rex. This dinosaur is orange, and does not act hostily toward guests, and seems to have been “tamed”. This large AA will occasionally roar, though it will also wag it’s tail and bow towards crowds.

The fifth and final float in this parade could be thought of in two halves. The first half  includes the two time machines from the film, flying in circles around each other. In the original, sits Lewis; the second seats Wilbur. These actors wave to guests from their time machines. On the back of this float rest the second half. This half consists of an actress playing Frannie Robinson, and of course, a silver stage with her musical frogs. The music switches to a bright, big-band swing piece, and it seems that the frogs are singing.

Celebrate the Future will be a great parade for Tomorrow Town, keeping the whimsical, almost childlike atmosphere of this area truly alive.

Retail

Mike Yagoobian’s Hats and More

Mike Yagoobian’s Hats and More is a retail location scheduled to open with the rest of Tomorrow Town. Mike Yagoobian is Lewis’s ex-roommate, and the villain of our story. Of course, young “Goob” was a baseball fan, and as an adult his sidekick was a technologically advanced bowler hat. It is only fitting that after Mike gave up villainy, he decided to open a hat shop, that also sells merchandise from his favorite sport.

The store is arranged so that all of the sections are in a row. Each section has its own doorway entrance, so that guests do not have to meander aimlessly in search of their preferred merchandise item. Outside each section, the sign reads “Mike Yagoobian’s” followed by the type of merchandise in corresponding section.

Inside, guests find that the walls are lined with shelves of trophies of varying shapes and sizes. These trophies do belong to Yagoobian, as indicated by his name engraved on them.

Guests find that the store is divided into four main sections. The two larger section are sections selling hats and baseball merchandise. The two smaller sections are sections selling Tomorrow Town merchandise, and that selling “Euro Disney” and “Disneyland Resort” merchandise.

The hat portion of this store sells all types of hats. From park-themed baseball caps to top hats to bowler hats to fedoras; Mike Yagoobian’s Hats and More won’t let you down. This portion of the store also carries hats that extend into the “slightly ridiculous” range. Large, showy, cowboy hats; hats with just a few too many feathers; “steampunk” top hats; etc.

Mike Yagoobian’s Hats and More’s “Baseball” section sells shirts, jerseys, caps, baseball cards, and even gloves and equipment. In this section, guests can find an old, worn out jersey reading “Yagoobian” framed on the wall.

The other two sections carry more typical merchandise. This includes mugs, shirts, baseball hats (Park-themed), trinkets, etc. The Today Town section also sells merchandise based on the film.

Science Fair

Science Fair is another retail location in Tomorrow Town. Inside, this room displays several large machines.

In Science Fair guests can find science kits, chemistry sets, and other scientific projects. Also sold here are accessories for everyday technology (cell phones, tablets, etc.).

The layout of this store’s merchandise weaves around the large contraptions, some of which are interactive. For example, large glass balls with poles charged with static electricity are within reach, thus causing guests’ hair to stand on end, as well as other objects with similar effects.

Mike Yagoobian’s Hats and More and Science Fair will prove to be a financially successful addition to Tomorrow Town.


Todayland Grille

Todayland Grille is Tomorrow Town’s major dining location. It serves a lots of different types of dishes, while not having an excessively expansive menu.. Every guest can find something they enjoy at Todayland Grille.


Guests dining at Todayland Grille will may not need a reservation, as the ordering style is similar to that of a counter service restaurant. As guests get in line to order, they can pick up menus to look over as they approach the ordering station.

As guests reach an ordering station, they find a large silver box on a podium. On these boxes are buttons labeled with the corresponding meal option. After guests press the button labeled “done”, they proceed in the line.

As guests give their receipt and pay for their order to a friendly cast member, they will be given a small device. These devices will all resemble time machine prototypes from the film (as they were before testing...). Similar to “Be Our Guest”, guests at Todayland Grille can choose any seat in the dining room, and a cast member will arrive shortly with their selected meals.

The dining room’s distinctive feature is the long tables. SImilar to that in the Robinson House (as seen in the film), guests may seat themselves at any of the long tables, designed to seat 10 people each. The chairs are the highlight of this seating; they are green and tall. They are whimsical and showy. Not all of the chairs are the same, there are several designs.

Nearly everything in the dining room is a silver color. The tables, and walls are all a slightly reflexive silver. The floors are a royal blue color, and the ceiling is left to a glass dome, allowing guests to see the sky during the day, and stars at night.


Conclusion

Overall, Tomorrow Town is a great new addition to EuroDisney. This land could be just what the park needs to draw more visitors, and bring light to a forgotten Disney film. Most of all, a glimpse of what the future could be what inspires guests of all ages to “Keep Moving Forward”.

“Around here, we don’t look backwards for very long. We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we're curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.”
                         ~Walt Disney

Edited: March 11, 2017, 10:52 PM

Kellogg's Land: Universal Studios Hollywood (Lower Lot- In accordance with the Evolution Plan)

Forgot Nintendo Land! Harry Potter who? Wake up bright & early for some exciting breakfast themed attractions!

The most important land of the day is Universal’s incredible new, Kellogg'sLand!

The brightly themed land has a distinctively “animated feel”, as if you were walking into a live action cartoon (I guess Toontown would be the closest in terms of style, but where Toontown has a suburban feel, this is a full on animated metropolis.)

There is a large 3D sun at the very back of the land. This is set to "shine" even when it's dark, to give the feel that it's always Saturday morning in Kellogg's Land.

ATTRACTIONS:

Froot Loops - Treasure Trove
In the South American jungle, legend has it, there’s a rare treasure, that only appears once every decade. This treasure is soon to be appear again, & a band of brave explorers will now race through uncharted dangerous waters hoping to be the first to claim the treasure! There is also only one guide who is brave enough to lead our treasure hunters, none other than that zany bird, Toucan Sam!

The ride vehicles for this wild water ride are colorful rafts of various (meant to resemble a large FrootLoop). There are 2 loading stations (opposite each other).

The ride begins as the rafts climb the hill & then careen down. After the initial splash down, the rafts follow their respective trails.

The raft enters the first cave. There an AA’s of Sam recounting the legend of the treasure & to watch out for Blackbeak, a scoundrel of a bird that will attempt you from finding the treasure. It seems he has boobytrapped these cave and waters in an attempt to stop the the explorers from reaching the treasure.

The rafts will twist & turn through a series of caves and taverns that also include "water traps" that will explode are certain points. The final scene (which is located in the last cave) is the treasure room. Here, there's a special effect that appears to turn the water milky white, as if the Froot Loop raft were in a bowl of cereal. The exit from this room is the final drop that sends the guest back to the jungle entrance. Sam congratulates the riders for finding the treasure. (The concept is finding the prize in a cereal box)


The Krispies Factory:

Uh oh! Snap, Crackle & Pop have forgotten the recipe for Rice Krispies Treats in their factory & its up to you to deliver it to them! Can you find you way to them? (This concept is based on the "maze games" on the back of cereal boxes)

This is an interactive walk through / ride attraction. Guest will see a large factory building in the background, this where you need to go! However, you'll need to find your way through the maze first!

The maze portion of the attraction is similar to the layout & style of a corn maze, only this one is interactive & hi tech. (There are also crew on hand for those who get frustrated easily) The route of the maze can be changed often (by the sliding doors), so there's no way to memorize the maze map. Oh, & beware! There might be a hungry critter on your trail, so watch which way you turn! The critter will be portrayed by a performer looking to surprise guest in a fun way.

Once you complete the maze and arrive at the factory, guest will board the Krispie Kars. There are four lanes, so there are four different loading zones. This is similar to a mini Grand Prix. Drivers must drive the Kars (which contain the recipe) to the baking section, which is at the back of the factory. Drivers will be scored on how many "snap, crackles, or pops" they hit. You want to try and avoid these small bumps in the road, because the Kar buzzes each time (and you'll be able to see your score on the car dashboard) The lower the score the better! The ride ends once riders arrive at the end of the track.

Pop Tart: The Discovery
Dr. Stevenson was considered by some to be crazy, by others a genius. Stevenson was a scientist, in every sense of the word & although he understood quantum physics, he was never able to grasp how Pop Tarts because so delicious, so he set out to mimic the experience, in hopes that he would understand......but something went very wrong. Now guest will retrace his steps in hope of discovering the truth about what happened to Dr. Stevenson.

Guest enter his abandoned lab, which contains countless blueprints & equations. There are audio recordings which detail his theories & other ramblings. As guest make their ways through the queue, they'll see fruit experiments gone wrong. The apple nana, the grape berry, the strawoloupe & more. Guest will finally arrive at the loading station, where there are two doors & the truth becomes clear. Stevenson created a human sized pop tart.

Guest will enter the pop tart (enclosed ride vehicle) & the count down will begin. Each enclosed tart will smell like a particular flavor (chocolate, fruit, etc). As the temperature rises (comfortably enough for guest to know that it's heating up) The vehicle shoots up in tower. It leaves the inside of the building as the tower rises higher and guest are now outside. The pop tart drops rapidly and once it hits the bottom, it shoots back up again! After the final free fall it lands safely back into the toaster. As guest are exiting the queue they find out Dr. Stevenson realized how ridiculous this entire idea was and he just moved to Albuquerque, because no one would ever be crazy enough to attempt this (which the riders just did)

PARADE:

They'rrrrr Great! Parade
This parade is led by everyone's favorite enthusiastic jungle cat, Tony the Tiger! The theme of this parade is to "show them what you can do". Tony is always encouraging people to have a bowl of Frosted Flakes & then go and do something amazing! This parade will give everyday guests the chance to be in a parade! The first 3 floats will contain the lands daily performers (an impressive juggling trio or gymnastics team) Basically an America's Got Talent style of skill. The final float will be filled with guest who just want to ride in a parade. The Leggo My Eggo house band will be playing on this float as people wave. (Guest must line up in advance, as if it were an attraction, to secure their spot to ride the audience float)

RESTAURANT:

The BreakSlow Pantry:

This restaurant is 100% breakfast, all day long. While you will find plenty of cereal options, there are also a variety of other breakfast favorites to enjoy & you never have to worry about that 10 or 11am cutoff, because you can have breakfast for lunch or dinner (Head to another land if you want those post "11:00 am foods")

The overall decor is meant to resemble a large living room on a Saturday morning.The employees are all wearing PJ's. There are multiple flat screens showing cartoons (These cartoons are animated content specifically for the land, so no other animated IPs) The booths are made up of couches, etc.

The Food:
There is an elaborate cereal bar contains everything from the standard popular choices to more eclectic choices. Guest will even find discontinued cereals from yesteryear here. (Made specifically for the park) as well as regional / international favorites. There are a variety of toppings & more milk choices than a Starbucks.

The other breakfast choices include standard fare (bacon, eggs, waffles, omelettes, etc) as well as a "Breakfast Around the World" menu & a large Nutella crepe station.

There are board games & coloring stations around the restaurant.

RETAIL:

Sleeping In!
This store contains a grab bag of nostalgia & fun. It includes the craziest selection of pajamas around. From adult onesies, to cartoon slippers, guest can also find those "cereal prizes" that were so sought after when they were kids. Stuffed animals & newer toys can be found here. Guest will also be able to customize their own box of cereal, with a name (Julie'Os, etc.)

Kellogg's Land is one you don't want to miss! To borrow a line from that famous tiger, "It's greatttttttt!"

Edited: March 12, 2017, 1:53 PM

TPA Playoff Challenge 3 Critiques

This challenge made me realize that just because some (most) people think a certain IP is bad/tacky/stupid/annoying, others think it’s brilliant and can find deep meaning and enjoyment in it. That was your challenge-show those of us that dislike/loath/hate your IP that it’s really a great source of entertainment.
Nobody said that qualifying for the Tournament of Champions would be fun or easy. Art isn’t pretty.

Andy Milito “After Earth”
I, along with 99% of the world, has never seen “After Earth” and was only vaguely aware of its existence. Looking at your proposal overall, I think you did a very good job of introducing it to that 99%. Reading your description of the film, I don’t understand what was so bad about it, but I think your proposed land probably makes it look much better than it was (which means that when that 99% goes home, watches it On-Demand and see how bad it (apparently is) they will be marching on your home demanding you refund them their money for the On-Demand fee! I would say you did your job.

I do have to say that I got the feeling throughout this proposal that you did something that could either be very smart or very dangerous- you played it safe. I got the sense that everything in your land is a reskinning of attractions already in theme parks, in this case WDW instead of Universal Orlando. They aren’t bad in any sense, but they are predictable.

“After Earth: The Ride” could be spelled “Star Tours”. I would be looking for Skrell Vader to attack the Ranger ship. It would be fun to experience, but honestly not really inventive.

“After Earth River Adventure” could be spelled “Kali River Rapids”. Would it be fun? Yes, and the interior section would be a welcome addition, but I don’t think that tigers, even post-apocalyptic tigers, live in caves. That sounds more like where I thought an Ursa would live, (I thought an Ursa was a bear based on the Latin word before I looked it up). Fun experience, but predictable.

“Ranger Academy” – yes, I’m going to do it again- could be spelled “Jedi Training Academy.” At least here you were innovating with the caged Ursa being interactive with the young Jed…er, Ranger Corps trainees. This would be a fun show if the animatronics were believable.

“Ranger Corp Outpost”- honestly, I think you could have some really cool stuff available here, unique in the Sci-Fi universe. Well- described.

“Raige’s” – the name was easy to choose- possibly too easy. It sounds like Raige retired and opened a restaurant. The menu would be appropriate, and most would probably not be concerned with the name unless you had a Will Smith look-alike working the food line or seating guests.

The parade would be visually really fun to watch- quite unlike any other parade. Good variety, but you had lots of richly-varied material to choose from.

Bottom line- Andy, you created an entertaining land, one that would be a good, appropriate addition to the park. It could be visually exciting, a good counter to Disney’s Star Wars Land up the Interstate, but it needs something original, really original, or it looks like a loosely-copied but lovingly-inspired tribute to Disney. If you end up in the Tournament of Champions, and in spite of your standings right now that is not a sure thing considering the formidable talents of your current opponents, you are going to have to 1) find the inspiration and originality that I know you have, and 2) don’t play it too safe.

DPCC inc. “Tomorrow Town”
DP, you started out with an anchor around your leg. You were supposed to choose a bad IP, one that was either critically panned, popularly disliked or socially ridiculed (or some vague version or combination of these). “Meet the Robinsons” was none of these. It grossed over $169 million at the box office and had a majority of critics liking it. While it certainly was not a major hit for the studio, it doesn’t have a stigma attached to it as being a really bad Disney/Pixar animated film. Nobody would be ashamed to wear a t-shirt with the movie logo on it- the logo is pretty cool (imho). Granted, it’s mostly been forgotten, but that does not make it a bad IP. As I mentioned before, you are a theater person, and there are several Tony award winning musicals that have never been revived, and some that have been revived when they had no business ever seeing the lights of a stage again…but that’s another story.
I read through your proposal start to finish four times. Parts of it had potential, while other parts of it were totally confusing. Whether the movie was good or bad, any sort of theme park ride based on it, or on parts of it, must be able to stand on its own without the riders really knowing the story line in detail. I didn’t feel that any of your three major attractions would really make any sense to visitors who didn’t know the storyline, or at least a semblance of it. If the movie was deeply imbedded in the culture of the riders, it would be a different story- it’s hard to find anyone who has not either seen Star Wars- at least one of the 764 sequels- or has not absorbed enough of the story line from pop culture that they can’t enjoy Star Tours without really knowing who is who and what is what in the SW universe. The storyline of Meet the Robinsons is hardly common knowledge- I did see the movie, but it’s been a long time and I don’t remember much about it. Reading the storylines of your dark rides reminded me more of a psychedelic trip than a time trip. I’m being serious- I am NOT trying to be all cutesy here. The story lines on the movie tended to jump around a lot with the time travel stuff, and without a running narrative to explain why things are happening (like why there is a T-Rex in the parade when everything else is so futuristic) you’re going to have a land that might be an interesting diversion but also a confusing one, and not a must-do-again collection of experiences.

There are lots of little things that I could pick on, but I won’t. In my opinion, you were in trouble the moment you chose this subject, and I recognized that when I saw it because I’ve done the same thing myself. Perhaps with extremely careful writing, editing and proofreading you might have been able to clarify the storyline more and explained what was happening in the rides better, and that seems to be an area that, based on last week’s proposal, you absolutely are capable of. I felt that you were trying too hard to include too much detail without providing a solid foundation.

I hate writing critiques like this, especially when I know and have seen what you are capable of. I’ve had off-weeks in TPA- to me, this was your off-week. Don’t let it happen again!

Jay R “Kellogg’s Land”

Jay R., my man, you did it! You nailed this challenge! You took an IP that is not popular (I rarely if ever see anyone wearing a Tony the Tiger shirt who’s not still in diapers) and created a land full of fun, entertaining experiences that actually had me laughing out loud.

Froot Loops Treasure Trove- Yes, this is another (sort of) Kali River ride, but theming the rafts like giant Fruit Loops with Toucan Sam interacting with the riders would make it much more fun than the serious overtones of Kali. I don’t know if Blackbeak is a real Kellogg’s character, but if not then get him copyrighted and sell the idea to Kellogg’s. What a great idea for a foil to Toucan Sam! Having the water turn white (I don’t know how, but I assume there’s a way) at the end was a brilliant detail.

The Krispies Factory- A rather odd juxtaposition of a walk-through maze and a grand-prix ride. I like the inspiration of the mazes on the back of cereal boxes very much- frankly I would make this a separate attraction from the grand prix portion. I think it would cause problems with crowd control and loading of the grand prix ride. This is one time when the whole is not greater than the sum of its parts. Make them two attractions.

Pop Tart: The Discovery- this is the one that had me laughing out loud. I loved the fruit experiments gone wrong, I love the idea of a human-sized pop tart. I loved how the temp would go up, the ride vehicle would smell like a variety of pop tarts, and it would be launched out of the top of the “toaster”. I thought this was a wonderfully imaginative concept.

They’rrrrre Great Parade: I’m not sure if you miscounted your floats or were not clear. If Tony the Tiger was on a float, then you had the three performers’ floats, then the one with people who wanted to be on a float, that would be five. Frankly I think this was the weakest part of your proposal- there are so many Kellogg’s characters that you could have incorporated into a parade that having three floats dedicated to live performers (that you didn’t mention anywhere else) was a missed opportunity. Along with Tony the Tiger there is Snap, Crackle and Pop, Cornelius Rooster, Milton the Toaster and Dig’em Frog, and many that are used internationally that could be incorporated into a float of their own.

BreakSlow Pantry- restaurants that offer breakfast all day are always popular, and this is the perfect place for an all-day breakfast. Great idea, and a fun restaurant for visitors and their kids.

Sleeping In!; Appropriate and unique shopping selections.
You had some typos, some grammar issues, and this is something that you are too talented to let go by. At this level of competition, this could be the deciding factor between being on top and going home. Don’t let something like that sabotage your hard work.
Excellent work!

March 12, 2017, 4:34 PM

FUN JUDGING!
CHALLENGE 3

What is bad? It turns out this is really opinion-based. (Who’d-a thunk it?!) My secret criteria – the way to get 100% with me – was to use anything that is officially, canonically terrible. That is, was it up for a Razzie? On the Imdb Bottom 100? On Wikipedia’s worst films of all time. Basically, I was hoping for stuff like Robot Monster or Manos: The Hands of Fate. (Or Sharknado at Universal Studios Florida- thought you were going that route, DPCC.) But with so many different types of glorious badness, I’ll judge on a case-for-case basis when needed. Suffice it to say, no one was penalized for defining badness differently than I do, provided they justified it well.

Jaiden – “M. Night Shyamalan Land”

Is It Bad? M. Night isn’t baaaaaaaaad, per se, he’s just really, really, really uneven. You’ve used some undeniably terrible Shyamalan films, like The Happening or After Earth (Razzie nominees for Worst Picture = 10/10), but you’ve also used The Sixth Sense (Oscar nominee for Best Picture = 0/10). I gotta average this out: 6/10.

So how’s the land? You’ve tried something challenging by including many of Shyamalan’s different films, rather than focusing on one. This can work. His films share common tones, settings and themes. After Earth feels out of place in contemporary Philly, however, since it takes place 1,000 years into the future. You offer no details about how it ties in. Another issue: Each film you’ve used is from a different distributor. The Sixth Sense is the only featured IP which belongs to Disney; the others are from Fox and Columbia. I assume you wanted more content than a single movie could offer, but the land feels slightly ramshackle as a result.

“The Happening Experience” (sounds like a 1960s love-in) is a faithful adaptation of a terrible film. Too faithful, perhaps, because you’ve retained Shyamalan’s stupid abrupt ending and his really boring plants. If I recall correctly, The Happening concerns invisible spores which cause spontaneous suicides; we never see anything badass like vines directly attacking people. It’s hard to picture a simulated train ride through this scenario offering much of interest.

“After Earth Coaster” seems like a fun coaster, but that’s all I know about it. Is this indoors like “Space Mountain,” like you imply? This needs more detail.

“Sixth Sense Trackless Dark Ride” sounds like your best ride, possibly because it’s the best Shyamalan film (sorry, Unbreakable fans). A trackless update on “Snow White” would be fantastic, and filled with genuine scares. It needs a name, still, as does your coaster. It needs more details too.

Similarly, you mention that food and retail basically exist, and that’s it. I gather you had very, very little time this week to give this proposal the attention I’ve seen from you previously. The final challenge gives you two weeks to create, so hopefully we’ll be seeing more of what you can really do!

Matt R – “The West Wing: The Land”

Is It Bad? No. “The West Wing” is one of the best TV shows ever. You say so yourself. But it’s not suited for a theme park, and by those criteria you’ve chosen well. I’ll allow it.

I’m quite fond of a land centered around the White House. You’ve shown admirable restraint by keeping things explicitly about “The West Wing” throughout. It would’ve been very tempting to go more fantastical in this setting – imagine an Olympus Has Fallen land (shudder!). The live actors really sell the immersion. Long term, that’s a tricky thing to maintain, but I see it working like Knott’s “Ghost Town Live” or DHS’s “Citizens of Hollywood.” I dig it.

“The National Theatre” shows how serious you are about maintaining a realistic policy wonk setting. It really does sound boring, a massive theater dedicated to fictional punditry. Not typical theme park fare, but neither is “Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln.” At the right smaller scale, I’m a huge fan of atypical attractions for thoughtful visitors. This sounds rather large, however, closer in size to DCA’s Hyperion Theater, so it maybe needs something with broader appeal, like a live musical or a stunt show. How to do that with your IP, I have no idea.

“The West Wing Tour” sounds a lot like the actual White House tours. As presented, I think it would only appeal to “West Wing” fans. As the walkthrough queue for a larger attraction – somewhat like the 30 Rockefeller preshow at USF’s “Jimmy Fallon” – this sounds great, but I feel it’s not enough on its own. Your land needs at least one more ride (in the presidential limousine maybe?). Your presentation is spot-on, but you’re not making new fans yet.

“War of the Roses” however does make new fans! Whatever liberties you’ve taken with the show here were worth it. I like the situation room preshow (though a screen-based briefing might be more feasible than live actors), and I like the premise. The ride sounds like “Hyperspace Mountain” with the Air Force (but more extreme), which is the right level of escapism for this land. It’s a little awkward that the ride concludes in Bermuda, then unloads in the situation room. Beyond that niggling detail, I’m a fan.

“The White House Gift Shop” is ideally realized. You’ve satisfied the challenge requirements with an extensive list of merchandise. Toby’s red balls are my favorite.

The diner is similarly good, and similarly well-grounded in the show. It needs a name, and I’m not sure the show provided one. An additional dining idea: state dinners in the White House.

The presidential motorcade is a natural fit for your (optional) parade.

Altogether, you’ve created a nicely detailed land which shows exceptional reverence for your source material. With only one ride, it’s not the most fun theme park land, but you’ve nicely tried countering that with immersive touches like the actors. While I feel your two non-ride attractions are somewhat lacking (meaning you fall short on the challenge’s “awesomeness” factor), I cannot fault how you’ve presented them.

Kenny Cook – “FIFA’s Soccer World”

Is It Bad? YES! United Passions meets all my criteria. It’s hard to find a “Worst Ever” list which forgets it. 10/10!

But this isn’t a United Passions land so much as a FIFA/World Cup land. Soccer is not bad; soccer is awesome!!! Just the occasional reference back to United Passions (which you never mention after your opening paragraph) would make this proposal more in tune with the challenge requirements. You also need to identify which park this is going into.

Before I delve into specifics, I’ve gotta congratulate you on your increasingly careful proposal writing. There is good organization and good detail. I believe you posted a rough draft earlier in the week, which I hadn’t fully read, but it’s clear even with a quick glance that your latest draft is a nice improvement.

“GOAL!!!!!!!” is the best thing you’ve yet created! The lengthy queue really captures the different sights of a soccer stadium using classic theme park tricks, and gets guests super excited for the game. The ride itself is technically ambitious, and also carefully planned. There’s almost too much technical detail regarding the loading process. I’ll leave it to AJ to play engineer; if Jurassic World’s gyrospheres would work, so would this. The idea of 20 gigantic soccer balls tracklessly bombarding each other on a field is, well, it’s a surreal image, but it’s fun nonetheless. For all the queue’s buildup, I do wish it weren’t merely a cycled flat ride. Could your cool ride vehicles be used in a dark ride context first (through other parts of the stadium), then climax on the field amidst the other balls?

“FIFA’s Soccer Spin” is pretty much just a Tilt-a-Whirl. There is nice soccer theming around it; I picture this whole land as being super colorful and kinetic. Not sure what a Tilt-a-Whirl does for your concept thematically. Feels like filler.

“Flight of the World Cup” is a fun variation on the “Soarin’” concept, but I think you’re really stretching the soccer theme by now. The entire queue is in airport hangars, and only the ride’s climax ties directly to the World Cup. The rest is a very admirable tour of international landmarks, but I’d much rather fly over live soccer matches, over a victorious nation celebrating. Show the nations of the world united by their love of sport, and you’ll show FIFA at its best. I think with some tinkering, “Flight of the World Cup” could be a really transcendent ride celebrating the best of soccer as a global institution. Move it away from the Epcot model (BTW, cultural representatives would work better in dining than in a queue) and you have the kernel of a winner here.

Dining and retail are both good, but somewhat under-detailed compared to your rides. I like how international they are. In fact, I think you’ve nicely captured the celebratory spirit of soccer throughout your land. I can picture spontaneous parties erupting. The biggest flaw (for this challenge) is simply how little it all has to do with United Passions. I leave “FIFA’s Soccer World” stoked about soccer, when you need to get me stoked about Sepp Blatter. An impossible task perhaps, but that was the challenge!

UNOFFICIAL SUBMISSION
Chad H – “The Outback of Crocodile Dundee”

Is It Bad? Thanks for the justification. In an Australian context, this does sound pretty terrible (like a Pepe le Pew land in Paris).

The proposal is just a quickie (and unofficial), so I won’t do scoring, or fault you for light details. The idea of an immersive, fantastical Outback land is a great one, one that theme parks don’t consider often enough. The aboriginal with the communication device really sells me on the specifics.

Zooming quickly through the rest, my favorite attractions are “Mick Dundee’s Outback Spectacular” and “The Regatta,” simply because they also “sell” me the most on the Outback setting. So too do “Cecille’s” and “Total Fire Ban.” Not really much more to say about this land (or how you’ve tied it in with Crocodile Dundee) but you’ve whetted my appetite.

March 12, 2017, 5:18 PM

Andy Milito - After Earth - I admit I didn't see the movie. It seems like a horrid plot, and a terrible experience. you laid it out very well.
The main ride looked to be a decent ride with a crap theme. (wouldn't be the first.)
With the River Adventure, my only criticism is to somehow tie it in more to the movie. Not having seen it I'm not sure how that could be done, but that would be my suggestion. Maybe include some of the main characters somehow.
Ranger Academy seems a little scary. Cutlasses? How would that be accomplished safely? Particularly with an AA opponent
As I was reading your menu for the restaurant I was hoping you would add some horrible choices like lima beans or liver. or maybe something you might have in a post apocalyptic earth.

DPCC - Tomorrow Town - I'm not sure how this qualifies as the Worst IP. What I read seemed to be a pretty decent attraction that would have broad appeal. What I have read about the movie and what you presented didn't seem all that bad.
For myself I would like to see more explanation in the beginning about the movie and what the plot was. Assuming it is a horrible one, you have to remember a great many of the guests will not have seen it and may well be there out of morbid curiosity.
There was some parts that you really laid it out well as far as how the experience would be. other times I had no idea
I liked the first retail outlet, but I'm not sure why you needed a second one. Would be a waste of space and dividing up your retail that way would cost you customers.
In the restaurant, I'm not sure how that would work. people are basically only permitted to order pre-set meals with pre selected items? or do they pick stuff ala carte? This needed fleshed out a bit, and I'm not sure how viable that is.

Jay R - Kelloggs Land - I get it.. it would be a terrible land... for most people. But I will tell you... I would have a great time there. some adults would find themselves kids again.
I just saw "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" on TV yesterday so that annoying song "Smile Darn Ya Smile" went through my head as you were describing the sun on the backdrop... and the view of driving through Toontown
I was hoping to hear about the guests encountering Blackbeak and what he would look like and do...
The maze In the Krispies Factory was clever... always changing. I can see, if you have operators on site, or a computer with sensors, that it could change as people are in it, separating individuals.
It took me a minute to figure out in the Pop Tart ride you are supposed to be in a giant toaster. but its different.
I'll be honest I would have a blast in the restaurant. especially with the long gone cereals. many of which I can remember.
The gift shop fits perfectly.


March 12, 2017, 6:17 PM

Before I begin, there's a few things I'd like to address:

-When I think of a bad IP, I think of something that would be generally dismissed outside of a small group of fans. I don't think any of you did a particularly great job of picking a bad IP, so I will be scoring you based on how well you converted your IP to a great theme park land.
-Instead of a linear run-through of your proposal, I've used a list of bullet points to make sure I address everything. I will be doing the same for the final challenge.
-When it comes to this type of proposal, at minimum I expect to see something comparable to the blurb that would be found on a theme park website for each element you present (attraction, restaurant, shop, etc.). Make sure to have at least this much detail for each element, or I will mark it down. Other than the headliner(s), a full description is not necessary. While I will not penalize you for overdoing it, note that in the final I may skim over these due to the length of full park proposals.
-Chad, I will be critiquing your proposal, but I will wait until the scores are in.

Okay, let's get to it!

Jaiden (M. Night Shyamalan Land):

-M. Night Shyamalan is not really an IP himself and does not have a film library of exclusively critical failures, so you're bending the rules by using him rather than going with a single underwhelming film of his, such as The Happening, After Earth, or The Last Airbender (which would have been an excellent choice for this challenge). Since all of the IPs are related, however, I'll let it slide this time.

-You have not told us why an adult-oriented land will benefit Disney's Hollywood Studios or Walt Disney Studios Paris. Without that detail, I can't help but feel this would have been a much better addition to a Universal Studios park.

-Theming the land to Philadelphia is a fine choice given the theme of your overall land.

-You've given very little description of your restaurant. Is it supposed to be like a mall food court, or is it specifically themed to M. Night Shyamalan? Remember, you're trying to sell Shyamalan, so everything should be connected to him and portray him as awesome.

-I have not seen The Happening, but your attraction based on the film seems to do an excellent job of recreating an attack. In my opinion, this is probably the best attraction in your area. I like that you've incorporated a queueless system as this is a good option for a train.

-Your After Earth Coaster is a very thrilling ride, but the references to After Earth seem mostly superficial. In a land trying to sell an IP, and particularly one at a Disney park, I would expect a lot more detail. Unfortunately, this coaster sounds a lot closer to what I would have expected from a Six Flags park. Particularly in Florida, I also think this coaster is a bad choice as the park's only other coaster is already super intense by Disney standards.

-From the start, using Sixth Sense in your area is a mistake as that is Shyamalan's most acclaimed film. In this challenge, we were looking for IP that, at best, is perceived slightly negatively by the public at large. Once again, your description is very lacking. Do guests ride around for 4 minutes and have ghosts pop out at them? If that's all the ride is, it likely will receive similar reaction to Motiongate's Hotel Transylvania ride.

-Assuming The Sixth Shop is your main shop for the area, you have given hardly any detail on it. Based on the challenge criteria, I unfortunately can't give you many points for that.

-I also am having a difficult time spotting your land's "weenie." You need something to entice visitors into your area, particularly with an IP they may not care about. Pandora has the floating mountains, Hogsmeade has Hogwarts, Cars Land has Cadallic Range...what do you have?

-Overall, to me your land has one solid ride and a bunch of misses, especially for something intended to be built at a Disney park. You are lacking description in several key areas, and portions of this feel like they were thrown together at the last minute to satisfy a requirement rather than given the amount of thought we would like to see in this competition. The base concept of your land is not bad, but you need to sell it a lot better than that. I understand that life can make it difficult to devote as much time as you'd like to this competition, but even if a description is short you need to make it count.

Matt R (The West Wing: The Land):

-The challenge this week was to take a horrible IP and turn it into a great theme park land. I think you mistook this as take an IP that would be horrible for a theme park and make it into a good land. Forgotten or not, an IP that is considered among the best TV series of all time is not a good option for this challenge.

-Universal Studios Florida was a good park to choose for this challenge. Your land will fit right in.

-The area you have recreated for your land is a great choice, and the White House is a good option to use as a "weenie." I also really like your decision to have live actors throughout the area.

-You're right...the National Theatre would be extremely boring to many viewers. Remember, your goal this week was to sell your IP and convince the general public that it is outstanding. This attraction doesn't really do it.

-As far as walkthrough attractions go, The West Wing Tour is a very good one. In fact, while I have not been to Washington, D.C. itself, I wouldn't be surprised if more people preferred your version of a White House tour. Even those who don't know the show will likely find this an interesting attraction due to the level of detail present throughout, though they may not get why it is popular enough for an hour wait. Again, the use of live actors is a great touch to make this feel fully real.

-As the only ride present, War of the Roses is not a bad one. I do think having a pre-show with live actors would be a bit difficult here...something like the projections used in Forbidden Journey's queue would be a better option. As for the ride itself, this certainly sounds like a thrilling roller coaster, though I would appreciate some additional details (ride duration, capacity, type and manufacturer, etc.). I also won't mark you off for this, but 3 inversions on a 50-60 ft coaster without a launch is pretty uncommon...most coasters similar to what you're describing are in the 80-120 ft range.
-I like your gift shop, with the main flaw being that it seems to have a little bit too much general merchandise and not enough that is West Wing specific. Even just noting that everything is branded with the show's logo would improve it.

-While basic, a diner does fit your land nicely, and you've got a good selection of food available. Once again, including actors here is a nice touch. In order to cut down on costs, perhaps you could just have one set of actors for the entire area (including the diner) and a smaller set specifically for the West Wing Tour.

-Your Presidential Motorcade pseudo-parade fits the land nicely and is probably one of the more entertaining things in your land. While more of a street show than an actual parade, it will still likely draw a crowd.

-Overall, I think you've done a great job adapting your IP to a theme park setting. Yes, you have one attraction that will make the Hall of Presidents seem riveting, but the rest of your land is very detailed and would be enjoyable to visit. The main problem is you picked an IP that doesn't really fit this challenge, and you didn't exactly sell the IP as pretty much everything you created could be genericized to save on licensing costs. However, this is an interesting themed area that is unlike anything else at Universal Studios and would at least give the screen haters a couple legitimate new attractions with no digital effects whatsoever.

Kenny Cook (FIFA's Soccer World):

-The difficulty with proclaiming United Passions as the worst movie ever made is that hardly anybody saw it. Something with a little more viewership (such as Movie 43, Jack and Jill, The Last Airbender, Disaster Movie, or Birdemic) would likely be a better choice if you're looking for a horrible movie. That said, your IP definitely qualifies as a bad IP.

-Watch your statistics, as several of them are incorrect. According to Wikipedia, FIFA funded 90% (not 99%) and the opening weekend gross was $918 from 10 theaters ($318 was opening day).

-Using a giant soccer ball as your icon is good, even if it is a little predictable. If this is meant to be a central draw, however, it should be placed back in the land rather than right at the entrance.

-I like your idea for a food court. It fits the theme of your area very nicely and offers something for everyone in just one location.

-GOAL!!! is certainly a unique attraction and would require some serious engineering to come up with a practical Gyrosphere ride system, especially given what you intend to have it do. A simulated Gyrosphere, however, where a trackless base supports a rolling ball, would not be too difficult to create, so I'll assume you'd find this acceptable. ILTPA stadium...clever. Your queue is very elaborate for what is ultimately a minor attraction, but I'm glad to see that you put effort into making it fully immersive. In my opinion, this is the reason guests should experience this ride. The ride area is great, and the viewing stands are a nice touch. I'm a little confused why you have a loading platform for this ride...why not operate this as a cycle ride? The ride itself seems chaotic more than anything, but it is fun for what it is. 90 seconds is also a good time limit, especially given how intense maximum intensity could be.

-FIFA's Soccer Spin is another minor attraction that is mostly filler, but it is a classic ride that will help distribute crowds. For a tilt-a-whirl, 90 seconds is actually on the short side, especially if you have the ride run in both directions (something tilt-a-whirls don't normally do).

-While it's been done before, Flight of the World Cup is a decent main attraction for your land. I do question your choice to have a preshow so early in the line, but given that you're using a queueless system beyond that it somewhat works. The following room certainly has a lot to do, but I can't picture anyone enjoying it for an hour. You need to keep moving people through your attraction, so try not to keep them here for more than 15-20 minutes before they move on. This is especially true when there is likely another 10-15 minutes of regular line following this room. The ride itself is very, very similar to Soarin', and while it is not necessary to fly directly over the world cup stadium it would be a good idea to connect the sights to it in some way. Simply flying over landmarks is not sufficient. Also, make sure your motion has a purpose and isn't just added for effect, as random motion is a way to quickly induce motion sickness.

-Soccer Central is a great store, with every piece of soccer related merchandise you could ask for.

-You failed to specify which park FIFA's Soccer World will be built in.

-Overall, you've created a detailed land and done a decent job of making soccer attractive. However, you failed to promote your chosen IP of United Passions in any way. Even if FIFA was behind the movie, you needed to connect your land back to the film, not just to soccer in general. Part of this challenge was making your IP attractive, and I'm not sure you did that, which makes your land difficult to judge. To me, it feels like you did a good job creating a land, but a poor job creating a land that satisfies the challenge requirements. While creativity is always welcome in this competition, you must be sure that you stick within what is expected, as a good proposal that meets all the challenge criteria will beat a great proposal that misses many of them.

Edited: March 12, 2017, 11:16 PM

Andy Milito – After Earth

Funny that for M. Night Shyamalan that The Last Airbender would be rated worse than After Earth.

Ugg…I really dislike the “special effects would cause the plants to appear snow covered”…I really wish you had not used such vague wording and had actually said what the special effect was. Lighting? Embedded LED’s? Fake snow from pods sitting on the roof?

One of the few things this movie has going for it is the presence of Will Smith, but you somehow managed to cut him out of the entire land. I understand that he is terrible in the movie, but Will Smith still has some star power, doesn’t he?

While the two rides and the show are competent, I’m not sure if the land has redeemed the film enough to sell merch. To those who have never seen the movie, the merch seems interesting enough to make some sales. The restaurant seems to be boring theme park food in a cool building, which seems to be the norm in most amusement parks.


DPCC – Meet the Robinsons

I’m not sure this qualifies as the worst IP ever. Some filmmakers would kill for a Rotten Tomatoes score of 66% and $169 million worldwide. While one of the forgotten children among the Disney films it still beats the pants off of Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice’s 27% Rotten Tomatoes score.

The Time Machine Ride…you start talking about the future of the world and how the land is all futuristic and then make the stylistic choice of steampunk vehicles. I don’t quite understand a retro choice in a futuristic world. Also, time machine trains are going to make the Back to the Future folks raise an eyebrow and possibly a lawyer. Also, while I understand the initial storytelling elements, I’m left wondering what the connecting tissue between the story elements and the actual ride is.

My biggest concern here is that this is an homage style land and not one that would significantly increase the visibly of a franchise while turning around people’s opinions of it. The off-putting quirky sense of zaniness is an entire ride here while one of the most memorable characters is only mentioned in the parade…namely the T-Rex.


Jay R – Kellogg’s Land
This choice is even more bizarre than some of the wilder ideas I had in my head. Despite that, I consider Kellogg to be a carefully maintained brand that is not considered bad or awful. While it’s sales are slipping, it is a cultural shift and not a problem with the brand.

I’m never a fan of combining two attractions. The maze before the Kar ride will just wind up being an extension of the queue.

The Pop Tart ride could become a bit of an issue for people who hate certain smells and will not board the next sequential vehicle. Like my wife would prefer to hold up an entire line and make a scene than to get near something that smelled like bananas.

This feels like your concept was a little too big. Each of your rides only used one brand from a list of hundreds that Kellogg’s owns. We didn’t get Keebler elves for one of their higher profile characters sets. It just feels like you could have reduced this down to a single brand and had more to work with. Either that or a concept that included as many brands as you could fit into the same ride. This doesn’t feel much like a Kellogg land than a product placement land….which was always going to be a problem for something that was a product.

To then take this back out to the focus of this week, to take a bad IP and make it awesome, I don’t think that has happened here. This felt more like nostalgia than redemption.

March 12, 2017, 11:14 PM

Serious Week 3
Andy Milito – 81.3
Jay R. - 80
DPCC – 63.3


Total Scores
Andy Milito - 245
Jay R. – 217.6
DPCC – 217.3

Fun Week 3
Matt R – 83
Kenny Cook – 69.5
Jaiden – 55.5


Total Scores
Matt R – 249
Jaiden – 209
Kenny Cook – 205.5

So who qualifies for the final?

Good question, I’m glad you asked it.

In both the Serious and Fun contest, second and third place are virtual ties, so all three listed competitors for both contests are in the final.

Keep in mind that the final project is due in two weeks and not this coming weekend.

Edited: March 13, 2017, 6:44 PM

Because this challenge was just too fun to resist...

UNOFFICIAL SUBMISSION

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NILBOG
Est. 1879; Pop. 26

Come to Nilbog, a wonderful half-empty town. Home to fresh mountain air, bucolic small town vistas, and ancient Druidic curses. Home to welcoming townsfolk, skin-melting food, and flesh-eating goblins.

The timeless 1990 camp classic Troll 2 provides inspiration for Kings Island’s all-new land, Nilbog! Troll 2 is a gigantic pile of crap. Imagine it, an English-language family/horror film made by Italian hacks. A film defined by language barriers and a nonexistent budget. The script feels like it was passed repeatedly through Google Translate. The amateur cast is made up of housewives, dentists, even a refugee from the nearby mental hospital (no joke). Despite the title, there are no trolls and it is not a sequel. It’s at 6% on Rotten Tomatoes. It’s on Imdb’s Bottom 100. Amongst “so good it’s bad” films, Troll 2 stands tall alongside the legendary Plan 9 from Outer Space and The Room. It is delightfully terrible!


“Oh my Gooooooooooooooooooooooood!”

Under the guidance of Cedar Fair head honcho Matt Ouimet, Kings Island looks to once again create immersive movie-based attractions, much like they did during the Paramount era. But where Cedar Fair previously had to retire blockbuster licenses like Top Gun and The Italian Job, now their focus is on disasterpieces such as Troll 2, filmic train wrecks which have already entered the public domain thanks to their awfulness. But fear not! Such IPs are cult classics. And with exhilarating attractions and quality theming, Kings Island is sure to have a hit on their hands regardless of Troll 2’s spotty pedigree.

On first glance, Nilbog simply resembles a forgotten Middle American small town. Decaying storefronts imply economic hardships, as does the forest reclaiming the town’s outskirts. The expansive wooded area in between “Diamondback” and “The Beast” fits our needs perfectly; little effort is needed to transform it into a haunted forest. Nilbog’s rustic storefronts pair easily with nearby Rivertown. Plus, Troll 2’s theme of nature’s revenge compliments Rivertown’s upcoming “Mystic Timbers” wood coaster quite nicely.

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Main entry to Nilbog is along a pathway where the old “Tomb Raider”/“Crypt” queue once sat. The massive “Crypt” show-building remains as Nilbog’s weenie, newly repurposed and façaded to suggest a long-abandoned industrial factory. An alternate entry connects to the “White Water Canyon” pathway (via tunnel under “Diamondback”). Trees and dilapidated structures throughout hide the towering hills of “Diamondback” and “The Beast,” and even though guests can still hear the coasters’ screams, those sounds simply add to the terror of the goblin-infested town they’ve now entered.

Yes, goblin-infested, for while Nilbog resembles a quaint little burb at first, it is actually a realm of dark magic and vile monsters. Storefront windows occasionally open to reveal hideous goblins! Opposite the rusted “Nilbog” town sign is a mirror reflecting the letters. The evil secret becomes obvious to all: “Nilbog! It’s “goblin” spelt backwards! This is their kingdommm!!!

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ATTRACTIONS

The Battle for Nilbog
A cozy farmhouse seems welcoming initially, but within guests finds themselves in a life-or-death struggle against teeming goblin hordes! From aboard their trusty family minivan, guests must fight back in an exciting interactive dark ride.

“The Battle for Nilbog” continues Cedar Fair’s Amusement Dark Initiative, as seen with Knott’s “Voyage to the Iron Reef.” Once again Cedar Fair teams with Triotech, fusing physical sets and state-of-the-art 3D digital film.

Guests queue in the Waits family’s vacation home. Backstory comes from possessed televisions, where the ghost of Grandpa Seth warns us all about vegetarian goblins who crave our human flesh – yes, that’s the film’s premise. The queue concludes in the attached garage, where riders load onto convertible minivans. Each vehicle offers two tiered rows of four, doubling the “Iron Reef” capacity to 1,600 an hour.

In the first scene, Grandpa Seth (a Pepper’s ghost) explains how he has used his arbitrary ghostly powers to create magical blaster guns. These weapons fire the goblins’ sole weakness – bologna! (Yes, seriously.) Minivans then proceed into the nighttime darkness of Nilbog – housed entirely within the aforementioned “Crypt” structure, with elevator shafts providing additional ride space upstairs. Computer-generated goblins attack, and riders attack back! These CGI creations show what Troll 2’s villains could be – not mere extras in burlap sacks and Halloween masks, but snarling nightmares from the id! For 5 minutes, riders brave forests filled with goblins, demonic trees, Celtic spirits, and a climactic giant monster formed from a dozen goblins fused together. This exhilarating, fun ride is sure to be a family-friendly favorite!

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Goblin’s Curse
Nilbog’s premier thrill attraction begins where the forest overtakes the town. Here guests succumb to a dreadful pagan curse. This otherworldly experience is realized with an Intamin LSM Launch Coaster - the longest and fastest multi-launch coaster in the world!

The queue begins in a ruined chapel, home to the wicked Druid priestess Creedence Leonore Gielgud. Dry ice cauldrons bubble. Occult talismans line decayed shelves. Myriad overgrown plant life pulses, much of it shaped like people – victims of Creedence’s deadly broth.

Ride vehicles resemble seed pods, accursed bio-mechanical chariots. Sixteen souls ride out at a time (hourly capacity: 1,280). First they double back into the chapel’s musty basement. Creedence appears (in a screen effect) above the stilled train: “This is myyy houssssse! Yooooooouuuu will be PUNISHED for THISSSSSSSSS! Ha HA HA!

Lightning! The accursed train roars outside at 65 mph, through a wild, twisted forest course. Onboard speakers play Troll 2’s ludicrous synthesizer soundtrack. The tracks – which resemble green kudzu vines – never rise above the tree line, preserving the stifling isolation of both “Goblin’s Curse” and “The Beast” nearby. Trains violently race through hairpin helixes, S-turns and airtime hills, frequently experiencing near misses with trees, tracks and intricate rockwork.

And that is just the intro! One minute into the ride, trains descend into a ditch of green-glowing tree roots. As Creedence cackles, trains accelerate instantly to 85 mph! The curse compels riders through a narrow cave and into a dreary meadow of gnarled human-shaped trees. Riders enjoy another minute of reckless coaster fun – our track is 5,500 ft – finally stopping within a hut alongside Creedence’s chapel.

Here she manifests alongside an ancient glowing monolith. While goblin faces appear from the darkness, Grandpa Seth’s voice chimes in: “The Stonehenge Magic Stone is the goblins’ magic power. Destroy it and break the curse!” An LED lightshow crumbles the monolith and ends the curse – and plunges riders down a surprise 10 foot drop track! So goes the surprise climax to a thrilling white knuckle coaster experience.

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Troll Trail
Kings Island’s first year-round haunt extends into the forest primeval. Here, intrepid guests come face-to-face with live goblin “scareactors” in a combination haunted trail/maze. Within the overgrown wood, thick with fog, terrible beasts brandish spears and chainsaws! This walkthrough attraction grows only more terrifying as it goes on, as guests must abandon the forest for Nilbog’s claustrophobic abandoned houses. Here in the ill-lit cellars, the goblins’ victims transform painfully into gloopy green vegetables and are eaten alive! (Not recommended for children.)

D’Amato Theater
A more joyous experience awaits within Nilbog’s single screen theater. Now playing: Troll 2! All are invited to heckle and participate, for Troll 2 has already inspired interactive midnight screenings akin to The Rocky Horror Picture Show (which also sometimes plays here, alongside other cult faves). For special events such as Halloween Haunt, Kings Island even invites luminaries like the Rifftrax crew to come and mock the movie live. Granted, “D’Amato Theater” treats Troll 2 with irony, but it is an irony informed by love, by a shared community of fans.

***

There is no parade. I won’t allow it!

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DINING

Nilbog Potluck
“Where you can’t piss on hospitality.”

Nilbog is famous for its delightful goblin cuisine. In the film, their food transforms unsuspecting victims into vegetable goo. In Kings Island, the goblins are more benign, and their food is simply delicious!

Here at the goblins’ church potluck, diners may sample any number of green-tinted treats. Try green “Nilbog Ice Cream,” green “Nilbog Donuts” and green “Nilbog Porridge” (Sheriff Freak’s favorite). And tackling Butterbeer in the “themed drink sweepstakes” is green “Nilbog Milk” (high in vitamin content). Some say it is like McDonald’s Shamrock Shake, but really nothing quite compares to this wonderful sweet ooze.

Given Troll 2’s “subtle” vegetarian subtext, “Nilbog Potluck” also offers an extensive array of healthy and appetizing salads. Finally, diners may even order our signature “Double Decker Bologna Sandwich,” poison to goblins but candy to meat eaters (served a-la carte or as a meal combo).

Brent’s Popcorn RV
Along the forest highway is the RV where poor Brent drowned to death under gallons of popcorn after a sexy witch caused a corncob to explode (again, not making this up). Popcorn indeed overflows from the RV. It is available either salted or as green kettle corn. Also available is freshly-steamed corn-on-the-cob, topped with melting green butter. Yummy!

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RETAIL

Fragasso’s General Store
Just a typical general store, just as you’d find in any obscure town. But behind its teetering screen doors are a myriad of Troll 2-inspired merchandise to wow your friends back home. Of note are various Nilbog t-shirts - “Visit Glorious Nilbog,” or Notre Dame-like “Fightin’ Goblins” – which have already proved enormous hits online. To go with the clothing are adorable stuffed goblins, plus convincing goblin masks and accessories. Or if you’re more inclined towards Creedence’s Druidic style, see our Celtic jewelry and occult souvenirs. These include small shards from the Stonehenge Magic Stone. Finally, Fragasso’s Book Nook is renowned for its multitude of vegetarian cookbooks. Within their pages are recipes for recreating goblin delicacies at home, including the famed Nilbog Milk!

***

With a unique launch coaster, a state-of-the-art interactive dark ride, and all manner of fearsome immersive horrors, Nilbog is certainly a distinctive land. While the awesomely terrible Troll 2 provides the concept, Nilbog goes so much further in fully realizing the weird and illogical fantasy world it hints at. Kings Island again looks to the movies, not the blockbusters it once explored, but the beloved fringe films which inspire true devotion.

As the goblins say, “Do you want some?”

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