Newsweek has an article on the Eisner debacle--you can read the full story here. The article features an quote Eisner made last year--one of his best gems--sounds like something Dubya would say: "Magic is about deception... creative deception. In a [Disney] ride, if you turned around, which you would never do, you would see unfinished backs of a lot of things. Our whole job is to deceive you into having a good time."
Must be talking about The Many Adventures of Winnie The Pooh. In any case, it's the perfect quote from a CEO who tends to do his job with skewed vision--promoting growth and shareholder value over supporting a fabulous legacy. Was there a trick to Walt's type of magic? Of course, using everyday math and science--forced perspective, smoke and mirrors--but it all looked so REAL, and he did it to make impossible things feel real, not to trick you into enjoying yourself.
In any case, it's role-playing time. Imagine (if you still can do so on your own) for a moment, a parallel universe where Michael Eisner has met his end and some members of the board have been stripped of their positions. Let's also surmise, through some odd quirk of fate, that the Disney board must ask Roy to return and he must bring in a replacement for company CEO. And, let's posit, that through some impossible magical feat, that I, Joe Lane, am chosen to fill the position--a job millions of die-hard Walt Disney fans would go to great lengths to acquire. The chances of such a thing happening are a zillion to none, being that I'm little adept in business matters, financial concerns, engineering know-how and politics--but you have to admit, thinking about it sure makes for an interesting (if not scary) idea. Let's assume that at this point, the budget is available (or will be available) for the following actions to take place over the course of the next ten years, and that the stockholders wouldn't have me ousted for what I'm about to do.
Alright, so I'm in my new office in Burbank, sitting at my desk. I have my little crew with me--Roy, of course, and some of the greatest minds in the creative community (along with the financial advisors and bean counters to make sure we don't go bankrupt--Walt had his brother, after all). First thing's first--we break the plan of attack into four parts: television, movies, public relations and theme parks. Naturally, the parks will be my greater concern, but for now, let's knock the other details out of the way.
Television. ESPN is doing a fantastic job, I can't deny that. As long as they're are sports in the world and ESPN is there to cover them, what can possibly go wrong, right? In any case, the attention would clearly be on ABC. I'm no television executive, so I'm not going to try and manage the whole affair myself. Instead, I'll have my support group put their heads together to brainstorm an individual who works in the network business that would bring back the life to ABC. But not just any ordinary television exec--somebody who can stay true to the Disney image. Selecting just the right person to bring ABC back up would not only put the network on the good track towards success, it would also free up my worries for other Disney matters.
It seems to me that the current trend with ABC is family sitcoms: According To Jim, George Lopez, Hope & Faith, Married To The Kellys, It's All Relative--other shows like Life With Bonnie, Less Than Perfect, and I'm With Her, while following a different format, look and feel exactly the same. All ABC sitcoms look the same--it's almost difficult to tell one from the other. Bring something fresh to the dinner table--something that doesn't look like it came pre-packaged. Muppets Tonight, for example--it didn't do too well in its first run, but it's so very different from the ABC sitcoms that it would certainly make an impact on the viewing audience. There's nothing like variety in a diet, whether you're having dinner or watching TV.
Movies. My first step would be a reclassification of the Disney movie system with three categories: Classics Collection, Sequels Collection, and Contemporary Collection. The Classics title speak for themselves, as do the Sequels. The Contemporary Collection will include movies and shows like the Disney Channel Originals, Playhouse Disney, and cartoons like Kim Possible and Teacher's Pet. Eventually, if a sequel or contemporary title does exceptionally well creatively, they might find themselves placed in the classics collection.
I'd likely have Roy in charge of feature animation again. The first step will be to reevaluate the recent changes for the animation division. Traditional animation never died--it's the uninteresting stories that made the division suffer. It'll be up to the Feature Animation division to create films that hearken back to the early years of Disney: movies like Snow White, Cinderella, and Pinocchio. What really made those films special? There weren't so many family value morals in these films--and they weren't so strong and in your face (i.e. ohana means family, remember who you are, etc.). What made a great Disney movie, like Sleeping Beauty or Alice In Wonderland, wasn't any type of moral, but just a wonderful story beautifully told! The company has grown into its family image so much that its choking the life out of them.
The same could be said for the live action films. Take the three movies based on attractions: sure it may have been poor writing or production--maybe it was the choice of actors, but whatever the case, The Country Bears and The Haunted Mansion played terrible on the silver screen, while Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of The Black Pearl went to the Academy Awards with multiple nominations. While The Bears and The Mansion did feature a wealth of different life lessons, I can't say I recognize any overall moral when it comes to watching Pirates. Pirates was simply an imaginative, fun story. Get the picture?
Public Relations. This would be the next big step in my plan to rejuvenate the Disney company. Walt Disney talked to the public. Frequently--usually on The Wonderful World of Color, hyping up Disneyland or an upcoming Disney film. Of course, we now have access to something fantastic that Walt himself probably could only imagine: the internet. On that note, as new CEO, I would launch a personal website about myself and the parks as a part of the Disney network. What would make the site unique is my personal updates--not simply what we're doing as a company, but what I'm doing as an individual. Message boards and opinion polls--it's a daunting task, but one I'd be willing to make a part of my daily life as the new CEO. My goal isn't to hide myself away, but to be more open and accessible--not some man sitting high and mighty on a corporate throne, but an individual who, despite the power, wants to see it all through the eyes of the Guest. My personal website would be a way to connect with the public and to let the public know what we're doing behind the scenes--AND to find out how they feel about it.
You can't please everyone all the time. It's a hard learned lesson Eisner has had to face. Unfortunately, it seems the only people he's willing to please are investors. Yes, investors are an important part of the company, and we want to make them feel special, but that doesn't mean neglecting our millions and millions of fans and supporters around the world just to do so. Eventually, the fans would leave (or worse, withhold 43% of the reelection vote) and then the company would suffer and the investors would lose out in the long run.
The theme parks will have to wait until next week, folks. There's a lot of improvements that can be made--so many it will take up an entire article, so that's exactly what we'll do with that final portion. Until next week, keep on ridin'.
If I were in charge, the 1st thing I would do would be to dump ABC. With ESPN, ABC family, and the Disney Channel, television presence is good enough. Network TV will never go back to the way it was in the 70's with shows like Happy Day's and Laverne & Shirley. America has grown up, and the networks haven't. Cable is where all the grown-ups go.
Animation is a growing concern. Sorry folks, but Pixar and computer animation are the future. Take the money from ABC and make a full leveraged buyout of Pixar.
Theme parks are what they are. Let them be self sufficient and stop using them to fix the bleeding in other parts of the company.
Leave the cruise line alone.
Dump the sports team. The future outlook, with players salaries in the clouds, sports team ownsership will not be profitable in the near future. Get out now. Sell 'em to the highest bidder and let ESPN cover it.
There was so much going on with Disney movies that people kinda become desensetized to them. Maybe we were spoiled? Maybe Disney movies need to be made a real treat again.
I would immediately sell ABC Family! Eisner paid too much for it and it is eating money still. There's just no there there, and I don't think there ever will be. Plus, selling it could make Disney more attractive to investors, saving it from a takeover.
Keep ABC. Networks aren't as dominant as they were in the 70's or 80's but they still can make hundreds upon hundreds of millions of dollars. You can't sneeze at that. Eisner cheapness is one reason ABC is doing so poorly (more on that in an upcoming Flume) but there are way too many chefs. Susan Lyne could do a good job, if she didn't have to go to Iger or Eisner for every single approval.
And I will say it again and again... SPIN OFF THE PARKS! Get them the hell away from this wretchedly run company!
I respond: I'm afraid that's not completely true. Home on the Range opens in April-I'm not sure if you consider that a summer movie, but it's close enough.
The one comment however that I do agree with is that It looks completely awful. Ok so We've got Lion King, Brother Bear, Lion King 1.5 and now this! Please create somethin not completely about animals. As you said Lion King was the last great 2D animated film.
Lilo and Stitch was decent but Chris Sanders was still independent when he created it and Disney pushed him away just like they do with everyone else.
By Summer movie, I'm referring to the Disney tentpole summer cartoon, usually released in the middle of June. With few exceptions, that's where they've historically unleashed their next A ticket animated feature (though they do mix it up occasionally, like Finding Nemo).
Wanna know what's coming out in their standard middle-June release spot this year? Shrek 2.
And I was wrong above. The teaser poster for Shrek 2 said it was coming out in June, but the latest trailer (oddly attached to MGM's Cody Banks 2?!?) has the release date bumped up to the end of May.
Speaking of Home On The Range, WDW Resort has a pre-parade advertisement float now. Actors and dancers dressed as country folk dance to the movie theme song and puppets of the cows from the movie hang out of a barn covered with wood cut-outs of characters from the movie. By the way, the silo and barn floats featured were both used during Mickey's Not-So-Scary parade.
