ARE YOU THERE GOD? IT'S ME, DEENIE
NY Times - Mar 9
Disney is doing its damnedest to make up for losing Pixar. It bought the Muppets and it will co-finance and distribute (a la the Pixar deal) the Chronicles of Narnia books. Jim Henson was a talent few can match - as recent Muppet projects prove - making the success of future Muppet enterprises a major question mark. The Narnia films - pretending they will even get to the second film - would need a magic lamp to succeed.
Well, Disney's latest deal actually has me a little impressed. The insanely popular Judy Blume has inked a deal with a producer, who will produce films from her books for Disney. While Blume's books mostly came out in the 70's, morons trying to censor some of her novels have kept her name in the public eye for decades. And the article claims six of the top ten books of all time are by her. Well, that's actually horribly incorrect. Only two of hers are in the Top Ten, and that is only the paperback list. Still, her name is all over the Top 100.
So which book did they decide to turn into a movie first? Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret?, the book that is usually the focus of those moron censors? Nope. Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing, the first book in the hugely popular Fudge series, and her biggest seller? Ha! Any book in the Fudge series? Nuh-uh. Deenie is the big winner. Huh? Well, it is all the way up there at Number 147! It's about a teenage girl, which is all you really need to know. Disney's trying to replace Pixar AND Hillary Duff. Sigh...
LOWER THE DRAWBRIDGE! RAISE THE CONSTRUCTION WALLS!
MiceAge - Mar 2
It seems TDA has finally agreed to refurbish Disneyland's Sleeping Beauty Castle for the 50th Anniversary. Now those of you excited about that boring tour reopening, unbunch your panties. They are going to get the "drawbridge" back to being an actual drawbridge. Apparently this will take a lot of work, so don't be surprised if the castle is closed for the entire final half of 2004. So as you enter the park, look first at the Disney Dorks lining up at City Hall to whine.
Personally, I think this is a spectacular idea. For very little cost, Disneyland can have a memorable event occur every single morning throughout the 850 months of the Anniversary. Seriously, I hope the lowering of the drawbridge isn't something they save just for the Anniversary. It would be a very cheap yet symbolic way to open Disneyland every day until the end of time.
IF YOU CAN'T MAKE IT THERE, YOU CAN'T MAKE IT ANYWHERE
Same article as above
Disney is evidently desperate to not allow California Adventure's numbers to fall after a surprising improvement in 2003, so new entertainment is being added all over the park. One area that might get new entertainment is the Hyperion Theater. Yeppo, the current home of Aladdin, the show that cost bazillions to mount. I have a feeling the show costs too much to even present each day, at least for the meager audiences that usually see it.
So what may take its place? The park had such a hit with Blast that Anne Hamburger is hoping lightning will strike twice. You mean Blast is coming back? Doubtful. But Blast in DCA was born from a successful Broadway show, so if Anne can't get her Aladdin to Broadway, she is going to bring Broadway back to DCA.
And what is Disney going after? Blue Man Group! Yeah, they're hugely popular in Las Vegas too, and Las Vegas is hugely popular with Southern Californians, who also have a little thing for Disneyland. I like the idea of not Disneyfying EVERYTHING, but I'm not sure how well the Blue Men will work in DCA. Sure, Disney stole from Cirque du Soleil - several times - and it has improved much of the entertainment in WDW, but Blue Man Group is a horse of a different... um... color. I'd love to see it happen, but then I'd be happy if Blast came back.
ME TARZAN, YOU MARY
Jim Hill Media - Mar 1
Yeah, I know. FOUR fairly positive Disney stories! In one Flume! It's the end of the world as we know it! Don't worry... the next two days will be filled with the usual Disney bile! ;-)
When I was in New York recently, I was enjoying walking past the Broadway theaters and noting which ones smelled of desperation. There were obvious ones like Taboo which closed not long after I left. The Producers which had no Nathan Lane or Matthew Broderick at the time, also had a distinct odor to it. Yet, none got my nose atwitchin' like Disney's Aida.
Many Broadway veterans have predicted the much-loathed - at least by the veterans - Beauty and the Beast would be dying off soon, but Aida was in the midst of its THIRD stunt-casting when I was there, which is never a good sign. Urinetown: The Musical was also stunt-casting with Charles Shaughnessy from The Nanny when I was there, and I knew that the wonderful show was soon to go to Urinetown itself. It did two months later.
But will Aida die? And what about Beauty? It is believed that neither will depart until Disney Theatrical head Thomas Schumacher, who produced both Broadway shows as well as the bonafide smash The Lion King, gets FOUR shows he produced running at the same time. Which would be most likely in late 2004 or early 2005, when Tarzan is expected to open. So expect Aida to continue losing money until then (why isn't Eisner micromanaging here and closing the show himself???) and for Beauty to do what it has to for survival. Which means STUNT-CASTING!
Okay, so that wasn't such great news. And I don't have much hope for Tarzan. Julie Taymor, the genius behind The Lion King was once attached to it, but I haven't seen her mentioned in a while. But I don't think she could overcome lousy songs a second time! And to make matters worse, Phil Collings claims to have six to eight NEW songs for the Broadway show! What have we done to deserve this???
Anyhow, the good news is that the Mary Poppins stage version is looking to challenge The Lion King in quality. Okay, if you come here regularly enough, you must know I am a huge Mary fan. So I hope and pray this is true. The musical will open in London late this year and, most likely, less than a year later on Broadway. But finding a theater is going to be a problem. Disney will most likely have to renovate ANOTHER theater for Tarzan, but Mary most likely won't need to go down that road. Why not? Because it will most likely replace Aida. And at least one other musical is moving along to the point where it could boot out Beauty soon after. The Circle of Life in action!
Hope the baby is doing well.
Don't be hexing this project with bad vibes, ok? Andrew Adamson (DIRECTOR OF SHREK!) and Weta Workshop (The FX team behind LORD OF THE RINGS) are in charge of this project. It's not being made BY Disney, therefore they can't f*** it over.
Not to mention an insanely loyal fanbase that rivals CS Lewis' associate's Middle-Earth stories.
Just because you don't happen to enjoy the music of two of the most popular artists in the world, is no reason to bash their shows. I am very disappointed that I missed Lion King during its Toronto run, and it deserves the title of a SMASH hit. But to degrade a show even before it has opened...or gone into rehearsals...or even casted yet! To degrade a show you know little to nothing about simply because one name is attached and another hasn't been mentioned for a while is just ignorant.
And just how does whether or not a show will open or be a hit, or have anything happen on Broadway have anything at all to do with theme parks (I'm okay with the first paragraphs...at least they are in relation to DCA).
On another note...while I may not agree with what you say in this flume...I offer you my congratulations and best wishes on the new arrival. Hope that the new niece/nephew brings you lots of happiness, and that you spoil him/her with many trips to every theme park in North America and around the World!
Mr. Hitt Thank you for your gracious response.
Mr. Hitt Writes: "It's not being made BY Disney, therefore they can't f*** it over."
I Respond: Want to tell me how you really feel?
(chuckle)
But let's look at what we do have. Phil Collins songs, which suck. Yeah, Collins used to be good back in MY day, but he has sucked for almost a decade now. Just check out his butchery of Cyndi Lauper's "True Colors." Or the fact he won an Oscar, which always goes to some horrible song. (Like this year's wretched LotR song.) Okay, his Tarzan songs weren't as bad as that Brother Bear crap, but they were still pretty bad. And I don't get the whole "one of the most popular artists" crap, since he wasn't one of the most popular artists when he actually WAS popular, back in the 80s.
Now Elton John actually is one of the most popular artists, at least if you consider his entire body of work. Which I love, by the way, but his Lion King songs simply did not compare to his classics, of which there are dozens. Mainly because the pedantic Tim Rice was lyricist, instead of longtime John collaborator Bernie Taupin. Okay, "Hakuna Matata" was cute, and "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" was tolerable, but the rest were generic, at best. But my "lousy" comment was a reference to Julie Taymor, who had serious problems with those songs. Which might explain why new non-John/Rice songs were added, don'tcha think?
I used to show the musical some interest, though, when I thought Taymor was attached. But it ends up the director is Bob Crowley, who did Aida. He didn't direct it; he did sets and costumes! Now this is NOT a good sign.
As for the cast, if recent workshops tell the tale, excellent Broadway actors like Adam Pascal, Matthew Morrison and Laura Bell Bundy may show up in the final production. But very rarely do the actors make the show. The spectacular Gypsy is not exactly tearing up NYC and Broadway darling Bernadette Peters is headlining. In fact, star-reliant shows like The Producers are rare on Broadway. So unless Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick appear in the show, casting is pretty much a non-issue.
The book is being written by David Henry Hwang, who wrote the fantastic M Butterfly and... Aida! Actually he isn't even credited for Aida but it is widely known that he "fixed" parts of the book. But, based on M Butterfly I will see his participation as a good sign.
Then we have the original source material. Who honestly cares? The Tarzan story isn't exactly epic like The Lion King or even Aida. And the songs are nowhere near as good as those in Beauty and the Beast. So I stick with the comments I made about not having much hope for the show.
