A lot of stuff seems to be going on at the Disney parks, so I thought I'd go over the more interesting ones. Like the new accident on Big Thunder.
Yep, another accident. Fortunately, this one took place without passengers aboard, otherwise it very well could have damaged Disney irreparably. One train crashed into another waiting train, and Disney's official explanation is employee fault. Which is kind of funny since Disney was told to properly retrain CMs following the investigation of the previous accident. Disneyland claims to be running three trains now, with a fourth on the way and people like Al Lutz are complaining about the lowered throughput. Personally, I think the complain here is that they reopened the coaster at all! CM error or not, there are obvious problems with this ride. Not to mention the crash WAS heard throughout the park and seen by many guests, meaning this minor incident - which is how Disney is treating it - could very well turn into a major incident if Disney doesn't play its cards just right. Maybe it's time they scrapped this problematic ride and put the long-rumored Geyser Mountain in its place.
Speaking of problematic rides that should be scrapped... It appears California Adventure will NOT be reopening Superstar Lame-O - I mean "Limo" - after all. Maybe the suits that decided to open it for summer actually rode it and discovered just what it was everyone was complaining about. I find this very unfortunate since I have never had the "pleasure" of riding it and had planned on a few trips through it for some kicks and giggles.
Anyhow, it seems the reason Superstar Lame-O has been left to die is due to OTHER plans for the park. Matt Ouimet apparently disagrees with Cynthia Gone-But-Not-Forgotten Harriss's belief that DCA could coast for several years after the Tower of Terror opened. Duh! Apparently there is now a "Five-Year Plan" for the park which will see the construction of a massive E-Ticket and a major D-Ticket in the next five years!
First, I would like to know what the new designation of D-Ticket is. Because I have heard some inside Disney actually call Pooh an E-Ticket. (Only if the "E" stands for "Eh.") I think Disney needs to redefine their lettering system. "E" should be for thrill rides and "D" for elaborate family rides. Pooh would be a "C", at best. Anyhoo, I am assuming this means DCA should be getting a ToT-level ride and maybe something in the range of Buzz Lightyear. Whatever Ticket they be, Ouimet has insisted they be unique and wow the whole family.
Ouimet wants a 21st-century Pirates of the Caribbean. He can't believe how well the ride has held up and wants something like that to decrappify the new park. That's all well and good, but I think Ouimet needs to realize that Pirates is not popular because it is such a fantastic ride. A lot of the love for Pirates or It's a Small World or Haunted Mansion comes from nostalgia. The modern-day equivalent of PotC is the Great Movie Ride over at Disney/MGM and no one gives a damn about that ride. Ouimet should want a 21st-century Splash Mountain or Indiana Jones, both of which are enjoyed by families AND have high popularity. Actually what Ouimet probably wants is Spider-Man, which he may actually admit behind closed doors but I doubt we'll ever hear it.
Second (remember how I had a "First" up there?), I have to question the ability of Disney to actually build two rides in five years. If these rides aren't already on the drawing boards, they will have a seriously hard time getting them both done by 2009. They've already started construction on Expedition Everest (the 21st-century Big Thunder Mountain... without all the crashing, one hopes) in Animal Kingdom and it won't be done until 2006. That's two years JUST for construction, folks. And they will need the first ride probably by 2006, when the thrill of ToT will probably have worn off. My glass is half-full at this point, if for no other reason than it sounds like Ouimet is forgetting about the long-rumored Rock 'n' Roller Coaster clone for now. Yay!
DCA also seems to be upping the amount of live entertainment in the park. Whether that is good or bad depends on what you expect from your entertainment. Except for some goofy bellhop show meant to entertain those waiting in line for the Tower of Terror, the new bits of entertainment - three of them - end with characters entering and/or encouraging guests to enter attractions few guests bother to enter. Yeah, like all the APs are going to smack their heads and go, "Golden Dreams? Why didn't I ever think of going in there???" The shows may still be fine, but when the main reason for them is so patently obvious, it's hard to be too optimistic.
Back over at Disneyland, the park is unsurprisingly trying desperately to create another animated hit. How desperately? By adding a Home on the Range petting zoo! A friggin' petting zoo! How "magical!" I know, there was a stupid petting zoo in the same spot less than a decade ago, but that doesn't make the idea any less cheesy. Especially when the Little Patch of Heaven is tied into a crapass movie. At least Universal's quickie tie-ins turn into REAL attractions (the Van Helsing walkthrough at USH should open in about a month).
Indy is back after a lengthy rehab and it is supposed to be as good as new. In fact, some effects have allegedly been improved upon. And other effects, which I learned have not worked for years, are finally working. Okay, I have never been that impressed with Indy and these nonfunctioning effects may be part of the reason, but to have them not work FOR YEARS??? Absolutely shameful.
WALT DISNEY WORLD
MousePlanet - Apr 5
Screamscape - Walt Disney World
Disney/MGM Studios' Animation Tour looks as if it will forever lose the "Tour" designation this fall. An upcoming rehab is expected to transform the building into one more like its DCA counterpart. Which is basically a good thing, since there isn't anything to look at in there anymore. While they are at it, they should work on creating a passageway from the Animation Courtyard to the courtyard in front of RnRC. Dumbass planners.
WDW has a new plan in the works for hotel guests. So far called The Park After Dark - does anyone at Disney know that prepositions aren't supposed to be capitalized? - the program may keep one park open three hours late instead of opening a park an hour early. This is a great idea, in theory, since hotel guests often don't show up until after 10 or 11 in the morning, let alone an hour before park opening. More guests mean more time for guests to spend money on food and souvenirs.
BUT there are a few problems with this. How do you weed out the people who aren't hotel guests? Will everyone have to leave the park before hotel guests are allowed back in? That seems like the only viable solution. And what happens to AK? Certainly that park won't stay open after dark. Would the non-animal sections stay open late? And where would all these guests go, considering there is little room for visitors during the day in the entire park. This could also be a problem for Disney/MGM, which has limited space to work with and very few places to put people. Would show schedules extend into the late hours? This could end up being a total nightmare.
Magic Kingdom's seriously pathetic It's a Small World is supposed to be getting a major rehab soon. It seems Disney has finally realized how lame this version is and is throwing millions at it to improve it. The famous Disneyland facade will somehow be replicated inside the building, and it should be getting new boats, lighting and sound. Gawd, you mean we might actually be able to understand the little turds singing? Wait, is that a good thing?
UNIVERSAL STUDIOS
MiceAge article above
Okay, just a little Universal news. Revenge of the Mummy, while already testing in Florida, is not expected to open in Hollywood until the 25th of June. What is the frappin' problem??? Let's hope its test runs are a little more complete than what I've heard about Florida's.
I don't know if this happened while I was on vacation, or what, but USH raised its prices also, to $49.75. I'd complain a lot about it, but USH is back to doing that promotion where one day gets you an Annual Pass, so it doesn't really seem all that expensive in that light.
Music.
Specifically, a delightful theme that is worked throughout the attraction and which advances and reflects the narrative.
Maybe I should take a few extra moments before typing this, but I can't recall an outstanding, memorable Disney theme park melody since Baroque Hoedown. Maybe Golden Dreams. But even that got a little purple for my tastes.
If Ouimet wants the 21st Century Pirates, tell him to start by finding the 21st Century X. Atencio or Sherman Brothers. Have them write a great song, then build a three-dimensional, interactive narrative space around it.
Boom, there's your next great theme park dark ride classic.
Though you do have a bit of a point. As much as people complain about the Small World song, it is probably the main reason the ride is so beloved. I do know of a sizable contingent who adored the Space Mountain song also. Plus, I think a lot of the love for Splash Mountain is because it ends on the high note of "Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah." And there are lesser attractions out there - Beauty and the Beast and Voyage of the Little Mermaid come to mind - which are coasting on their good songs.
So, I say they should try out your hypothesis and build a dark ride around a good song or two... like, say, Mary Poppins!!! Okay, I know this doesn't fit in DCA, but this bolsters our earlier idea to dump the Fantasyland Canal crap and build a Mary Poppins ride. I'd love to see how popular such a ride might become.
What makes this one special is the many different variations throughout the attraction that all seem to blend. At the very beginning, you're met with a slow, eight note funeral dirge, but as you progress throughout the attraction, different variations on the same tune come out. By the time you get to the graveyard, the song is in full force, complete with singing busts. I always find myself humming the tune exiting the manse.
Although, I do like the way the Small World melody is passed through the treatment of world music as the ride progresses. Hearing it in so many languages and styles shows a deeper understanding of world cultures on Disney's part.
