VALENCIA, CA—Promoting the coaster as "the most heartbreaking ride on earth," the Six Flags Magic Mountain theme park unveiled its newest attraction this week: a 395-foot-tall steel roller coaster designed to simulate a grueling three year relationship with Deborah.
Developed by world-renowned and recently single engineer Phillip Werner, the Life Force Crusher-X is said to feature six disorienting vertical loops, 150-feet of highly unstable barrel rolls, a portion in the middle where the ride just suddenly stops for no reason and refuses to start again until riders apologize, and an unexpected 310-foot drop at the very end.
According to park officials, the coaster begins with an impulsive burst of acceleration that, when riders reflect upon the experience years later, will prove to be the only enjoyable portion of the ride. A series of unexpected and painful twists rapidly follow, leaving riders confused, strangely resentful, and wondering if they made a huge mistake getting on the ride in the first place.
Wait a minute, that actually sounds like a few coasters I've been on.... :-)
Jokes continue below....
I'll just stop at that.
Guess the link doesn't work...I'm a computer-phobe, so I wouldn't know any other way to link it.
Still refraining from commenting on the first story...
Here is one of my favorite theme-park-related stories.
Dialogue is R-rated, so be sure to get your parents' permission before - oh, the kids already clicked on it. Nevermind.