Enter... the Mater-Horn.
The Matterhorn Bobsleds are completely rethemed to a storyline where guests are trying to help Mater learn to ski. Every turn is accompanied by all new dialogue recorded by Larry the Cable Guy. The animatronic Abominable Snowmen are removed and replaced by animatronic versions of Mater.
So, your turn. Ruin a classic attraction for the sake of profit.
The velvet tones of everyone's favorite Ghost Host are replaced by the chain-smoking-headache-inducing drones of Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus. "Allright, ya'll! Time to buckle up for a ride you'll never forget!"
Throughout the ride, we are subjected to the insanity inducing songs of Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus as performed by animatronic likenesses completely out of kilter with the classic haunted themeing we all know and love.
After one day of operation, the ride is shutdown and eventually returned to it's original state after a number of actual death certificates are issued for park guests.
How about replacing the Monsters Inc ride at DCA with a new dark ride that turns the rider into Hollywood's newest celebrity, taking him or her through a variety of recognizable and somewhat stereotypical locations and situations throughout the greater Los Angeles and Hollywood areas. We can even include some delightful animatronic cameos of Hollywood stars who would make B-list actors look like acadamey award winners. A name like Superstar Limo might be appropriate.
Oh wait...
Why would you even voice such an opinon?!?!
This takes over one of the mountains, turns off all of the effects, guts the theme of the ride, and takes all of the magic away...
Rock n' roller Coaster: Disney Channel Edition- On this coaster you can choose from among the best singers including Zac Efron in High School Musical, Miley Cyrus as Hannah Montana, and more, because "We're All In This Together!"
Guests would board the same vessels as before, but instead of being whisked away into some of Disney's most immersive environments, they would cruise through hundreds of video screens. Each screen would repeat the same fragment of the Pirates movie franchise over and over again. The ride would last about 30- to 45 minutes longer than it should and not make much sense. Also, there would be a promise of a new adventure each time you ride it, but instead it becomes conspicuously repetitious and inane with each visit.
Adding Tim Allen and Tom Hanks to Jungle Cruise is a great idea! Throw in a Johnny Depp cameo and you have a bona fide hit!
And I like the improvements to Rock n Roller Coaster mentioned. Get rid of the Geriatric rock of Aerosmith, and go modern. I actually like Phineas and Ferb's Rock 'n' Roller Coaster even better.
As for Corporate Accounting Mountain, it has already been built. It is called Volcano The Blast Coaster and it resides at Kings Dominion in Virginia. Great ride, but totally, I mean totally, devoid of theme, narrative, effects, or magic. Real shame, if you ask me.
And if we are going to add modern music to replace Aerosmith, let's hope its not Disney Channel music. Selena Gomez and maybe Demi Lovato are the only Disney stars who are naturally talented singers. The rest Disney just hooked up with voice coaches, yes, including Miley Cyrus.
@Steve Even Disco Yeti is now gone. It's now Barely Visible Yeti!
1. Larry the Cable Guy
2. Weak story with no heart.
3. Larry the Cable Guy
4. Second film has terrible moral.
5. Second film is borderline racist.
6. Larry the Cable Guy
7. Entire franchise driven by merchandise.
8. Still no attractions for Wall E or Incredibles. Yet Cars gets a whole land.
9. Larry the Cable Guy
10. I can ride Radiator Springs Racers in Florida. It's called Test Track. Guess what? No Larry the Cable Guy.
I've already scared myself. I can't go on with the description...tiny high schoolers that are too peppy all around...AAAHHHH!!!
But hey, to my credit, the name of the thread is "Ruin a Classic Attraction"! =)
We'll add in all the things we adults loathe. Hanna Montana, High School Musical, Wizards of Waverly Place, Suite Life and any other horrifying Disney series following wannabe teenagers about. You know, the ones that makes us start looking for anything in which to remove eyeballs and eardrums as quickly as possible.
We'll fill the park with these people, in costume, they can sing and dance, the kids will be amused and the adults will be walking threw living hell become reality. They can see their parents utterly terrorized! For an additional $50 you can buy the "Earplugs and Valium" package which may save you some minor pain!
Otherwise, Amanda wins!
Here is my contribution:
Now at the Magic Kingdom, you remember Tom Sawyer island, well now, you will learn to love the newly themed DISNEY VACATION CLUB ISLAND!
-Visit the tree house where you will be whisked away on a path to watch an hour long movie on the joys to owning your own piece of the resort.
-Jump aboard the shipwrecks where you will see the skeletal remains of those who chose not to buy into the program.
-Do you dare enter the dark mysterious caves?! Find your way through to discover burried treasure and also Trevor, head sales manager, who will gladly speak to you concerning the transfer of your time share to off resort properties.
-Take a journey to the famous waterwheel where you can catch some splashing water and also talk to accounting staff for financing options.
(James carefully applies his guyliner as he hits 'submit message')
Thanks ladies :) I am still having nightmares from my *shudder* creation.
Pigs in Space Mountain.
Soarin' over New Jersey (sorry, couldn't resist, Jersey is a lovely place and I go there often)
A North Korean Pavillion in the World Showcase (I know that breaks the rule about modifying existing attractions, but I still like it.)
I can see it now, a large square glass walled skyscraper, completely empty. 20 feet high fences keeping people out...and in. Row upon row of empty shelves in the ground floor store. Workers staring blankly at the people on the outside too scared to go near the 20-foot fence.
