IT'S TIME TO LIGHT THE LIGHTS
Anyhow, say a theme park company DOES buy the Muppets, or makes a licensing deal with whoever does. Why not treat them better than Disney has and create an entire LAND for them?
IT'S TIME TO MAKE THE MUPPETS ON 'THE MUPPET SHOW' TONIGHT
What are your ideas for a Muppet land? (Now remember, the Sesame Street Muppets - Big Bird, Elmo, Oscar and the rest - are NOT part of "The Muppets." We are talking Kermit, Miss Piggy, Fozzie, Animal, Sam the Eagle, Rowlff, Statler & Waldorf, Swedish Chef, Rizzo, Dr Bunson Honeydew and Beaker, even that shrimp from the Long John Silvers commercials... you get the picture.)
as far as the rest of the attractions go, I haven't had time to develop any major detailed ideas yet, but I'll throw out some general ideas just to get us started.
-Quality Shows- the major theme of almost every good muppet film or television show has been their showbusiness dreams and putting on a show. So let's give them one.... or three or four.... you could have a Rock 'N' Roll show starring Dr. Teeth & the Electric Mayhem, maybe a nice piano bar style cabaret show with Rowlf at the piano, and of course a big Broadway spectacular with the whole gang.
-Rides- I don't have a lot of truly brilliant ideas yet, but let's try a few... an Animal rollercoaster. A ride based on the Great Gonzo which is a high tech new thrill ride experience that allows you to tag along on his wacky adventures, including getting shot out of a canon. Maybe a water ride which is sort of a tunnel of love on crack. It could be themed as if Piggie designed it herself as a tribute to Kermit (but of course making herself the diva star she is in the process). how about a small themed land which has a collection of smaller rides developed by Dr. Honeydew and Beeker. I'm sure I'll think of more later...
-restaurants- a cajun joint hosted by Pepe. A classic all-American eatery hosted by Sam the Eagle. theater style concession stands.
-for the kids- The kids play area has two choices. Either have Kermit's nephew Robin be the host, or theme it to the Muppet Babies.
Bring on some more ideas people!!
I'm the one that came up with this thread and I don't really have many ideas! Animal just SCREAMS a wild coaster... Sam the Eagle would be a good flying coaster.
But is this all enough for an entire park? Actually, I think there are enough themes. Hollywood ("The Muppet Movie"), Manhattan ("Muppets Take Manhattan"), Pirates ("Muppet Treasure Island"), Outer Space ("Muppets from Space"), London ("Great Muppet Caper"), even Xmas since they have done zillions of specials and such for it.
Within each theme it would be easy to fill each with attractions for different characters. Not that an entirely Muppet park would be a huge lure, but let us pretend in that direction. Also, if you were to choose ONE theme for a Muppet Land in a park, which theme would work best and what five attractions?
ATTRACTIONS
First off ... A NEW Muppet Vision 4D Film including: Muppets in Space ... echo, echo, echo ... A chance to boldly go where no one has. Featuring Captain of the Swinetrek, Link Hogthrob. ... Dr. Julius T. Strangepork, however, gets the last laugh--the theatre is actually a spacecraft (not a simulator).
Popular Characters (without ride tie-ins) roam around Sesame Street greeting children, like Big Bird, Snuffleupagus (who would want to be in that costume come August), Ernie & Bert, even Oscar the Grouch could pop out of his can once in a while.
Kermit Frog Hoppers -- Move the popular fountain attraction from EPCOT to here; add a dash of Kermit.
Spin Me Elmo -- A combination Tea Cups/Dumbo clone, where the cars can be raised and lowered as they spin, all the while Elmo's shrieks and cheers are clearly audible as he sits in the center of the attraction!
Dr Bunsen Honeydew's Lab -- Open to the public for the very first time: Honeydew has created a serium of such Earth shattering composition he just has to share it with the rest of the world--Beaker lends a helping hand. Meep! Meep! Meep!
Animal's Band Jam -- Animal, Zoot, Floyd, Clifford, Dr. Teeth and Janice crash Aerosmith's limo to perform on the way to the concert hall -- a miniature Rock 'n Rollercoaster. "Dang, I think I just busted a move."
Let's Groversize! -- Grover takes on Richard Simmons. An interactive, health conscious attraction.
"Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, Eagles are from America" -- The American Experience recounted by the Muppets, featuring Sam the Eagle.
Wocka! Wocka! -- Fuzzy Bear hosts a slew of new comic talent. Jokes would include Muppet and Disney visit references. Johnny Fiamma & Sal make a guest appearance, with musical interlude by Rowlf. Scooter is in a charge of production.
Gonzo-Coaster! -- Bring on the Robo-Coaster with a Disney/Muppet touch. "No parachute? Wow! This is so cool!"
Pig Pen -- A Galaxy-style rollercoaster with dueling track: Andy and Randy get a go at it.
EATERIES
Børk! Børk! Børk -- The Swedish Chef cooks up a heapin' helpin' of yummy yummies. Included on the menu: Robin the Frog's Veggie Burger; Rizzo's Pizza; Statler and Waldorf Salad (of course, S&W will be on hand to heckle "Wocka! Wocka!"); Pepe Poppers; and Swissburgers, onion rings & fries.
A Streetcar Named Dessert -- Sweetums and Bobo the Bear are on hand to serve very tasty treats, pies, and Cookie Monster cookies.
SHOPPING
Lé Porc Absolu -- Or, "Magasin Porcin de Manque." ... Er, Miss Piggy's Shoppe. "If it's expensive, it fits."
A View From the Balcony -- Statler and Waldorf offer a wide assortment of useless articles. Statler: "Why do we need a VCR you can program seven years in advance?" Waldorf: "So we don't miss any great shows that are on after we're dead."
Sesame Street Store -- Yep, a replica of the very same store featured on the TV show, offering Sesame Street memorabilia as well as "The Daily Rag" and other assorted items.
But I wasn't just being mean about the Sesame Street characters. Busch already has Sesame Place, so those characters are being done. Plus, after the "Muppets" left Sesame Street, Henson made a big point of separating the two. Big Bird in "The Muppet Movie"... no Big Bird later!
Spaceship Bert - Spaceship Earth but with the noise of Bert humming the theme tune really loudly in your ear.
Twilight Zone Tower of Elmo - Exactly the same, but instead of seeing out onto the park, you see a movie of Elmo going on the same ride as you, but not managing to put his seatbelt on, so is consequently chucked around the elevator, screaming loudly the whole time, and eventually dies of concussion and multiple broken bones, as the ambulance comes and takes him away at the end of the ride.
Its an Animal World - Small World, but once in the building, you find that Animal has trashed the building, so loose gas pipes roar as flames occasionaly are let loose, and the singing dolls are in 'suggestive' positions. All the time you hear Animal's sick laughter.
NOTE: This ride is only suitable for those over the age of 18.
El Rio Del Pepe - You sit in a stationary boat for ten minutes in front of a motionless Pepe puppet (or should I say, muppet) as you engage in a staring contest that is bound to make you fall asleep.
Just like the real ride.
And that's without mentioning the new ride of Phase Two: Kermit to Extinction, as you sit in a car that throws you about to the point of total pain, as you go past crap scenery that you wouldn't want to see, even if you could see through complete darkness.
(in that order)
Truly cannot top any of those ideas : )
You don't understand what it's like having that song blasting down the radio 24/7. But as for the 'touch my bum' bit...
By the way, what does ROFL stand for?
R - Rolling
O - On
F - Floor
L - Laughing
: )
--RAS
However, I got this in return:
"Hi. This is the qmail-send program at smtp1.crystaltech.com.
I'm afraid I wasn't able to deliver your message to the following addresses: bj.mills@blahblahblah.com. This is a permanent error; I've given up. Sorry it didn't work out."
That song sounds awful. But I just remembered Piiiiiigs in Spaaaaaaaace! That NEEDS to be in the park!
Breaking News!
Muppet Co-Creator Frank Oz will now have his own Land to be placed on Disney Studio's Florida property: "Mucking Fuppets" (a term described by the late John Belushi) will feature Yoda as the land's host, and will contain attractions surrounding the Lost Muppet Characters of SNL, as well as a dark ride based on the hugely popular The Dark Crystal movie. A restaurant will feature Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors and An Indian in the Cupboard souvenir shop will be on location. When contacted about the new Disney/Muppet Land, Oz was quoted as saying, "I will do anything I can to help Disney. However, I will not wear that ******* La Choy dragon costume. The La Choy dragon was a bitch."
--RAS
That 'Cheeky Girls' song sounds plain stupid to me, and I'm glad I don't hear it 24/7. What if you worked in a grocery store and heard Leann Womack's 'I Hope You Dance' 24/7???
Not to be harsh, but I don't think the John Belushi term would be a good idea. Not if it encourages kids to talk profane.
Spaceship Bert and Tower of Elmo? Pathetic. Bert's humming just cannot fit the phenomenal theming of Spaceship Earth. The fact that Elmo gets swiped by the motion of the ToT elevator and eventually dies is NOT funny at all. No. Not that I don't appreciate characters on the thrill rides. Plus engaging in a staring contest at an idle Pepe Le Pew does not entertain kiddies.
Two hilarious ideas: IASW trashed by Animal (not as hilarious as the shoot-the-dolls-for-points theory) and the Band Jam which is also known as a Rock-N-Roller-Coaster parody, when Animal crashes 'Aerosmith's limo' trying to make a gig. Now that's funny!
And by the way, D.T.: those rides were jokes! I'm guessing you realised because you didn't post anonymously. Honestly, I don't know why I bother with humor sometimes.
'Just had to chime in.
"HuMor" ---flipping dictionary pages. Er ... What about the Mouse?
Ps ... Yes, even this will change in time.
: /
--RAS
Some of these ideas are only 'make believe' in the sense they have not yet been conceived.
Now that the Disney Co. owns The Muppets outright, it would be fortuitous for them to expand upon that empire.
